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Continuing the journey

Hi All

Decided to drop the 'month' from the title of this thread as time moves so quickly and the date becomes irrevelant so quickly.

Hubby and I both feeling pretty drained today but not because of his illness. However it is something that has made both us further stressed and 'outside our control'.  Prepare yourselves for a rant or look away now.

Having put in a long work day yesterday (both of us). I switched on my mobile on leaving work to find a message from the social worker for Mum (regular readers of my thread will know what we have been going through recently).  The upshott of this message was that the Social Services panel have decided that they can offer Mum a place at a sheltered housing complex but not the most local one. The call was to advise me of the panel's decision and to tell me that a visit will be arranged this week, preferably by Wednesday, for Mum to be taken to visit the flat and be told about the package of care and how it will work. They require a decision from Mrs K (this is how my mother is addressed in the follow up e-mail!!) by Friday otherwise the placement will be offered to another service provider!  Unfortunately this means Mum has little choice but to move further away (closest sheltered housing has no vacancy and they are  not willing to help fund where she has spent the last 9 months 'settling in').  The guilt I feel at being unable to cope with this is overwhelming, my hubby is very supportive and angry in equal parts and I am dreading the days ahead.  I am unable to take leave and my negative feelings towards her social worker would not work in Mum's favour as she needs to go on the visit with an open mind and the care home staff state she is quite able to make her own mind up.  If she agrees I will be unable to visit as regularly (my problem not theirs of course) but apparently the social worker will accompany her and I have asked to be kept informed.

Even typing this is making me sad/angry/frustrated and emotionally/physically drained.  I was due to visit Mum today but this is on hold until I have spoken to the care home this morning. Hubby says I should leave it till later in the week when we know what is going on and I suspect he is right (bearing in mind my physical upset involves many 'loo' visits (enough said!!)).

Sorry for all the negativity but just needed to get it out and try and get  myself together before I start on the phone calls.

Hope everyone has a good day.  Regards Julesxx

  • Hi Jules

    If hubby does not show much interest then just pick up a few bits and pieces as it will probably be trial and error.  Was a bit like that for me today.  Jacket Potato and Cheese for lunch whcih was fine but was not particularly hungry for dinner so did a chicken grill and chips.  Grill was ok but chips were so bland.  Had the same a couple of days ago and it was fine.  Hopefully taste will be back to normal in next couple of days.

    Sorry to hear your arthritis is playing up in the wet weather.  Wish there was something I could suggest to help.  Perhaps a bit of rest and relaxtion might help.

    Best wishes.

    Gill

  • Morning Gill

    Love jacket potatoes myself with lots of diffferent toppings but favourite at the moment is tuna.  Know what you mean by tastes changing daily but hope you too will find things improving quickly now main treatment is complete (that must feel good).  See we are in agreement as regards Brian's little woody friends - just very clever what he can 'turn' his hand too with wood - lovely craftmanship and I find wood very tactile though as yet have not taken up 'tree hugging'. I  have recently seen a lovely photo my daughter took our her eldest son doing just this in the park - huge tree trunk getting a cuddle.   Will your daughter  be home from uni for the bank holiday weekend?

    Spent another night tossing and turning (hot flushes have a lot to answer for just at present) but still up and about early and am  now in relaxed mode whilst hubby dozes after breakfast.  Still no plans for the weekend but will probably go birthday present hunting for my Mum (we are putting funds together as a family and getting some new clothes for her) on one of the days and Farmers Market on Sunday (just love strolling around and its within half hour walk of home). Also have a load of 'cut down greenery' to bag up ready for next collection whilst its dry.  May get a night out tonight, just waiting to hear from my friend to see if she is up for it and whether her car is back on the road or if we may take the bus.

    Hope you have a good day today and a happy weekend ahead.  Take care, sending hugs. Jules x

  • Hi Jules,

    Day one was fairly slow, but here is a photo of a couple of peoples work.

    [[ ]]

    Also a picture of my books

    Take care have a great weekend, Brian.

  • Hi Jules

    Have no real lans for the weekend as I was not sure how I would feel.  But shaky today but ok now.  I am counting down the "lasts".  Today was lost dose of steriods and anothr drug.  On Monday I start last batch of injections.  Final two infusions are 20 May and 10 June.  The first is the final exam day for Alice and the second is her birthday!

    She is not home this weekend as her first exam is on Tuesday and she decided she would get more revision done at Uni and that is more important at present.  She is currently planning to come home for the weekend on 24 May but she may well change her mind and come home before then.  I think it will depend on how revision is going.

    I do agre about Brian.  It is so unfair.  I have started sewing again which I used to do a lot of but have not had much time for the last couple of years.  I want to make a duvet cover and matching pillowcases for Alice ideally before she comes back for the summer in the middle of June.  Will have to see how it goes as I have not had much chance to use the overlocker which was a birthday present.

    I do hope you get a night out as it will do you good.

    Best wishes.

    Gill

  • Hi Brian

    Sorry to hear it was a slow day.  Might be because the weather was good.  Hopefully it will pick up tomorrow and Monday.  It does look as though you have some competition but I am sure you will sell out as your pieces were really well done and beautiful.

    Best wishes.

    Gill

  • Morning Brian

    Love the pic and you are all amazing at your craftsmanship.  Hope today will be a little less slow (think Sunday is more a day for 'outings').  Still with so much in common am sure you all find plenty to chat to each other about.  Your array of books looks very impressive.  You give so much time and effort to the things you produce so hope you get more visitors today - weather here is already warmer than yesterday and lovely and sunny.  I am meeting my daughter and grandchildren later (son in law having some peace to watch British Touring Cars) and will enjoy the walk to the Farmers'Market (maybe a spot of Brianitus too!!).  Good luck today. Jules x

  • Morning Gill

    Hope you are feeling better today.  Every one of those 'last' treatments is a step closer to your recovery.  Do take it easy.  Both you and your daughter have very important dates ahead and when they are over, hope the celebrations are planned - maybe you will be able to enjoy some 'naughty treats' too.  Wishing her all the best with her exam on Tuesday and she is probably best placed at the Uni to keep up the revision with access to information/books etc. Hopefully she will make it home for the planned weekend but before you  know it, the summer break will be upon you.  Love the idea that you plan to make a new duvet set for her summer return.  I am hopeless at anything 'crafty'.  When I was first expecting (a very long time ago) and gave up work to raise the family I bought a sewing machine thinking I would make all sorts of things.  Managed a teddy bear (well thats what it was supposed to look like), hated it and promptly sold the machine asap.  That's when my love of charity shops began (and continues today both for me and my daughter!!).

    Weather here is good again this morning and am looking forward to a few hours out with daughter and grandchildren whilst the men watch Touring Cars.  Hubby did not have a good day yesterday (mainly due to lack of sleep the previous night as found it hard to get comfortable) and its kinda hard watching him struggle  but then got to try carrying on with 'normality' (me being in the garden and him indoors is how its always been).  I do find it hard enjoying my meals knowing he cannot face much food (though eventually after I had a little nag at him to take his top up pain relief he managed a cold meat platter).We are getting used to eating him eating at all sorts of odd times thoughI try and keep my meals on tract (otherwise I eat far too much ha ha)  He really does not like taking the extra tablets even though it helps. He never complains but makes me so sad watching, knowing he is suffering in silence (still no good at communication in words!! but seems to forget I can 'read' his actions and it worries me more having to second guess whats going on!). Will see what the next couple of days brings and may give his support team a ring (he wont!!).  Good sign so far is that he definitely slept better last night and is still 'away with the fairies' at present.  Keeping my fingers crossed for him.

    Well am off outside to fill up the Swingball base (have a feeling the eldest grandson will beg for it to be out so will 'jump the gun' and have it ready).  Take care and have a good day.Jules x

  • Good morning Brian,

    Well those wood carvings are wonderful and I for one would come and see your exhibition if i lived within easy reach.

    Your books look wonderful too.

    I do wish I had time to learn to carve wood, maybe one day if we ever get to retire.

    Mind you I am hoping husband will help me with my Teepee poles today and drill the holes in that I need so I can start making Avas Teepee. 

    I hope you have more people today come and see it all.

    Best of luck for the rest of the weekend. Hope the weather is kind.

    hugs

    Annabel. xx

  • Hi Jill,

    Just been catching up with this thread of Jules and wanted to wish you the best of luck with the rest of your treatment.

    I hope your tastebuds get themselves back on track soon.

    I have to say my sense of taste and smell deterioated with smoking, but unfortuneately even since I gave up smoking neither sense is great, a little better but not great.

    It doesnt stop me eating though....!!!!!!!

    I was reading about your hopes to make a duvet cover and pillowcases for your daughter Alice. That is something I did for my son Alistair a few years ago, I made it in some warm tartan fabric and I put a spare duvet in it, a superking. He and his girlfriend recently got it out for the first time as they were cold and found that it was a super warm thing . They phoned me up to thank me for making it. Well it must have been at least 4 years ago that I made it but at least hey are getting use out of it now. LOL. You are so lucky to have an overlocker. I have never used one but I have to say that I have thought about getting one. It would probably be  a sensible thing to have when I start making my Grandaughters teepee, which will be soon as I only have one other project to do before hand.

    I hope you feel well enough to start your duvet cover soon and enjoy.

    best wishes and hugs

    Annabel. xx

  • Hi Jules,

    I hope this message finds you well and having a lovely time out with your daughter and doing lovely womanly things.(Charity shops are goodfun).

    You deserve a break every now and then. We all do.

    I enjoyed my little trip down to Lewisham last week and my looking after Ava was very interesting and lovely with lots of cuddles.

    The only thing was she's getting chunky with all this mixed feeding and was quiet a little weight to carry her up and down stairs.

    Anyway the two of us had a great day and she behaved very well overall. Just one grumpy moment which told me I had better take her for a walk in the pushchair.

    So we went around the park and then to a couple of shops.

    Had a lovely time with Charlotte as well. On the Saturday I spent time in their garden helping them repair fencing and weeding and moving plants. They had been having a fox sleep in their garden so were trying to keep it out because of the little one.

    I can't believe that I have been back a week already and we are now into May.!!!! Where has this year gone already. I have to say I do try to do as much as I can these days without wasting time, but had a week of catching up with the garden this week and found that I could hardly move yesterday evening. I think I over did it . HeHo. Trying very hard not to go out to do anymore in the garden today as have 2 hard working days coming up. I find the gardening  so compelling but there is no easy stopping place. I can always find more to do.

    I hope you and your husband have a lovely time this afternoon with the  family. Now don't over do the swing ball.

    Take care, Hugs

    Annabel. xx