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Continuing the journey

Hi All

Decided to drop the 'month' from the title of this thread as time moves so quickly and the date becomes irrevelant so quickly.

Hubby and I both feeling pretty drained today but not because of his illness. However it is something that has made both us further stressed and 'outside our control'.  Prepare yourselves for a rant or look away now.

Having put in a long work day yesterday (both of us). I switched on my mobile on leaving work to find a message from the social worker for Mum (regular readers of my thread will know what we have been going through recently).  The upshott of this message was that the Social Services panel have decided that they can offer Mum a place at a sheltered housing complex but not the most local one. The call was to advise me of the panel's decision and to tell me that a visit will be arranged this week, preferably by Wednesday, for Mum to be taken to visit the flat and be told about the package of care and how it will work. They require a decision from Mrs K (this is how my mother is addressed in the follow up e-mail!!) by Friday otherwise the placement will be offered to another service provider!  Unfortunately this means Mum has little choice but to move further away (closest sheltered housing has no vacancy and they are  not willing to help fund where she has spent the last 9 months 'settling in').  The guilt I feel at being unable to cope with this is overwhelming, my hubby is very supportive and angry in equal parts and I am dreading the days ahead.  I am unable to take leave and my negative feelings towards her social worker would not work in Mum's favour as she needs to go on the visit with an open mind and the care home staff state she is quite able to make her own mind up.  If she agrees I will be unable to visit as regularly (my problem not theirs of course) but apparently the social worker will accompany her and I have asked to be kept informed.

Even typing this is making me sad/angry/frustrated and emotionally/physically drained.  I was due to visit Mum today but this is on hold until I have spoken to the care home this morning. Hubby says I should leave it till later in the week when we know what is going on and I suspect he is right (bearing in mind my physical upset involves many 'loo' visits (enough said!!)).

Sorry for all the negativity but just needed to get it out and try and get  myself together before I start on the phone calls.

Hope everyone has a good day.  Regards Julesxx

  • Hi Jules,

    Thinking of you today.  I know they say time is a healer, but on anniversaries etc I'm sure old wounds reopen.  Hope memories are more pleasant than painful ones.  Hope x

  • Hi Jules,

    Just to say I will be thinking of you today. Just hope that any memories that surface are good ones.

    Take care, best wishes and hugs sent your way, Brian

  • Hi to Gill, Brian and Hope

    Thank you all very much for your kind words.  Remembering my Dad with much fondness today.He always said he had lived a good life and was amazed to reach 85 - his words are often in my ears these days so I  still ' carry his strength around with me.  Hope you all having a good day.

    Back down to earth for me returning to work - very  busy returning stock to publishers to make room for new arrivals - as they say never a dull moment.  Take call all and your thoughts much appreciated.Jules xx

  • Hi Jules,

    Just wanted to you send a warm hug today. It's so good that you can now remember your Dad with such fondness rather than deep sadness today and how you still feel his strength.

    Take care, lovely Jules, Jo xx

  • Thanks Jo, thats very kind of you.  Hope you still managing work okay and not feeling too shattered.  Take care. Jules xx

  • Hi Jules,

    So glad that yesterday passed with happy memories of your Dad.  Hope you didn't work too hard returning all that stock.  Take care.  Hope x

  • Hi Jules,

    It was so nice to read how well you coped yesterday and how you remembered your father's strength of character. I feel he would be justifiably very proud of his daughter like your virtual friends on here are. There are some people you make contact with in life who definitely lift your spirits and you are one of them.

    I went to see my grandchildren last night and my cheeky grandson opened the inner door, saw it was me and promptly closed it again. He told my son, there is a very old man standing on the doorstep. In the end he almost dragged me inside demanded I take my jacket off and read him a story.
    Afterwards, I went to our monthly wood club meeting and really enjoyed the evening. The talk was about ancient trees (don't tell my grandson Jules as he will probably say I planted them) The speaker was so enthusiastic it made the talk even better. One of our member who has prostate cancer also asked me some questions last night which I was able to answer for him. His specialist, doctor, and nurses don't seem to have given him much info at all and he was not sure of the side effects of treatment so I was able to put his mind at rest regarding this. I also enrolled three new members so all in all a very good evening.

    Hope you are enjoying this spell of good weather and I bet you cant wait to get back out in the garden again.I hope this nice weather might entice your husband to go for a walk with you, even if only for a short distance.

    Take care Jules, hope you have a good weekend, Brian.

  • Hi Jules .Hope you are well and looking after yourself been a bit foggy in cheshire today but did lots of power washing the last two days front path and two patios` at fhe back all ready for a few BBQ`in a week or two .

    did a small BBQ  yesterday just to help to clean  the gear a bit .I am still waitung to get my apps out of the way 5 days to my scan and then .??

    I took some pictures today in the garden  hope you enjoy this one .regards for now georgexx[[ ]]

  • Morning Hope

    Have posted on your own thread but wanted to say thanks for your continuing support to me and others on the forum.

    By the way we were still filling boxes with books when the 'pick up' lorry arrived so it was a mad scramble at the end (in an effort to send back as many as possible on the list!!) and were in the end only 45 items short of over 800 required. Phew!!!  To think I then relaxed by mowing the lawn and weeding yesterday!!

    Take it gently this weekend and am sending you peaceful thoughts and comforting hugs. Jules xx

  • Morning Brian

    Good to hear that your cheeky grandson is still in great form and I can see you are being kept busy with all  your different interests.

    I spent a good part of the day in the back garden (and managed another mowing!! - just love the Flymo Lite) and its looking so much tidier than a week ago. Soon (when the sun returns - cloudy at the  moment) I will Spring Clean the 'plastic' furniture as its still too wet to sit on the grass!!  Managed our usual night out yesterday and our husbands were enjoying the pub atmosphere so much they kept us waiting an extra half hour  - it was great to know he has been able to enjoy himself.

    Our daughter and children are visiting this morning (son in law is working) so am expecting to be outside with the football later!!

    Hope you and Mrs B have a relaxing weekend with 'nutty' treats - absolutely no chance of that new shop not having at least one regular customer.  Sending hugs and kind thoughts. Jules xx