Hi Mickied

Just logged back in after doing a bit of housework (ugh) and it was lovely to get your post.  Thanks, I am virtually fully recovered from my tumble down the stairs - makes you feel so silly when they are the same stairs I traverse many times a day!!  Bruising is going through the usual stages of wonder colours and the cut on my elbow has healed fine. Think I was very lucky to get off what now seems quite lightly.

Hubby is plodding on and about to change his medication regime (from twice a day slow release to three times a day) as GP thinks this may help with the little bit of breakthrough discomfort he mentioned to her last time he was at the surgery.  It is very humbling that though he never talks with me regarding his illness (think this is both because of his self protection and he feels its less of a worry for me) neither does he ever complain about his situation.   

It would be a bonus to have a win at the bingo (wish you could see one too) but in the scheme of things the  night out is a more important factor for me.

Am so pleased the tidal surge did not materialise (saw the warnings on the TV).  We have certainly had and are still having a lot of heavy rain but thankfully our area seems to escape the worse of the surface flooding so far.  Last time we saw flooding in this road was the year we bought the house (37yrs ago) but it only affected the garden and did not get inside thankfully.  Would be good if the snow could keep its distance too (we are due a weekend away at the month's end and am so looking forward to it) as it always causes so much mayhem. Don't think my daughter would fancy dragging the pushchair through it to get her older son to school but somehow think my eldest grandson would be ecstatic (as would his Dad) as the last time we had snow they (and thus we) had a great time building the snowmen!!  Just hate it when it turns slushy/icy and with my luck would not doubt find myself in the thick of it!!!

Hope to chat again soon and in the meantime hope you and the family have a happy and peaceful weekend.  Virtual hugs   Julesxx

Hi Jules,

Glad you are OK and that grandsons are doing well. Am waiting for eldest to come home for the weekend, both boys are back studying hard now and eldest has even more exams in couple of weeks.  You are right about the forum being a great support, it helped me so much in my darkest days that it is the least I can do to try and offer support back.  I think all of us on here truly understand how bad it can get.  I'm not doing too bad at the moment, I do have flashbacks in my mind to the horrible times but I try to tell myself to stop thinking about them and try and think about the happy times.  Of course the happy times also bring sadness because you want them back, but I think if you continue to think about the bad things you witness with this terrible disease it would be impossible to move forward.  I'm rambling on now trying to justify my way of thinking, better go and make dinner instead!  Have a good weekend.  Hope x

Morning Hope

Bet by now your eldest is enjoying the comforts of home (or having a lay in!).  From my experience of losing Dad (6yrs ago inMarch)  nearly all my memories now are good ones even though we had some rough times contact wise once I married and had children (Mum could never understand why I would want to have a family).  He worked hard to keep the peace but understandably his place was at my Mum's side and it was hard for him when on occasions he was forced to stay away.  Needless to say overall I actually have happy memories growing up (my childminder was like a second Mum and being an only child, having the company of other children up to the age of 16 was a godsend).  Strangly when my children reached school age and I was at that time working from home my parents would have them for a week during the main school holidays and give them a week to remember.  Mum always says she was born without a maternal bone in her body but I can't believe that and still think her own childhood was so traumatic it affected her own wellbeing.  Of course being older and supposedly wiser now perhaps I understand things more.

Hope you enjoy your weekend though have to say here it is once again throwing down the rain making it likely that indoors will be the place to be.  Take care  Jules xx

Morning Jules,

Hope your weekend is going well despite the rain.  I have spent some quality time with eldest at the gym!  He is training to do a half-marathon for the hospice that helped my Mum and Dad.  I would have liked to have taken part too but unfortunately at my age am not such a good runner as him and couldn't have covered that distance.  It is so comforting to hear from both you and others that as time passes the memories of those we've lost are just happy ones, I do think of the happy times now but it is still raw and thinking of the happy times inevitably still makes me cry; I'm sure it will change in time.  I'm glad you can reflect on your childhood with happy memories and yes getting older does enable us to understand things clearer and perhaps see why people behave in certain ways.  Enjoy the rest of your weekend.  Hope x

Morning Hope

To be honest think this forum and the continuing support we receive/give has helped me in so many ways to understand my own personal life (both past and present) and in a way its sad that being touched by cancer  means that it is only now that I have learnt such things (must be getting old!!!).  I envy the energy of the young and good luck to your son with his mararthon quest. In the past 10 years I have both jogged and walked the 'Race for Life' - suspect the next time I do it I might be 'pushed' but whether taking part or sponsoring I make sure I do something to help the good work the charity achieves.

The weather kept me indoors yesterday so spent some of the time trying to re-organise the storage of all my Mum's stuff in our spare room (at least now I  have a bit more floor space even if the boxes are stacked a bit higher!!).  Hubby has begun his new pain med regime and yesterday spent more time asleep than awake which did not please him much but its early days so we will see how it continues.  At least he managed to eat inbetween sleeps and for the first time in some months seems to be enjoying crisps/coffee again (found these unpalatable after chemo and even though that was over a year ago now (where does the time go) his taste buds still affected.

Today has shown us the sun so am shortly going to the local farmers' market to stretch my legs and relieve the boredom of the TV screen.  Hope you enjoy your day. Jules xx

Good morning Jules,

Hope the sun is shining where you live this morning like it is here in Sussex. I was out yesterday at a Macmillan cancer meeting. They are just about to start to build a new cancer drop in centre in Brighton and the committee I am on is to do with what facilities the centre should have.

Yesterday one of our members told us that some of the ladies that belong to the cancer group she runs live in Rye in Sussex (Nr Hastings) and were told they would have to travel all the way to Maidstone in Kent for their radiotherapy treatment. But they have had to turn it down potentially life saving treatment as they cannot afford the travel costs. This is so sad.

Sorry you wernt lucky on the bingo but as you say it more important for you to have an enjoyable night out with your friends. I bet you are looking forward to a few days away at the end of the month. I have just found out that the timber yard I used to work is is closing down shortly as the owners are retiring.

Take care and hope whatever you do today is enjoyable. Best wishes, Brian.

Morning Jules,

Like you the weather kept us in yesterday, and rather than have husband mope and whinge because he couldn't get out to do x, y and z I settled us into the task of sorting the dairy.!!!!!

This is probably the largest room in the house and stores everything from freezers to vacum cleaners, brooms, a large stock of spare things for the business, like crockery cutlery, toasters kettles. It is also the store for all things cleaning and it is a large pantry. We had a wonderful productive day getting filthy. There is just things under the stone benches that now need sorting but that is for another day. I have promised husband that if it is not a wet day today then I will help him outside moving trees.!!!!!!! More fool me. I also have some upholstery to do today before visitors arrive tomorrow. It is Sunday today isn't it?, the day of rest. !!!

Enjoy your time at the farmers market, would pefer to come with you than move trees. Lol.

It was good to hear your hubby enjoying tastebuds again after chemo.

How are the granchildren doing Jules. ? well I hope. Ava is gaining weight fine and sounds very gurgly and cheecky. They are coming up to see us for a weekend at the beginning of February. Am really looking forward to that. I suspect we could do with some of that sun you've seen if you could spare some that would be great.

Take care of yourself Jules love and hugs

Annabel. xx

Hi Annabel

Hope the sun has reached you by now even though that will mean tree shifting for you and your husband.Where are they going?!!  Must say you are finding a lot of enegy but suspect like me you find being 'shut up indoors' hard.  Though like  you I managed a fair bit of housework it would not be my first choice.  I spent two hours walking this morning and visited the market en route.  There is a lovely cheese stall that I always stop at  and nearly always buy something.  No different today - I had a few tasters and came home with a piece of cheddar infused with spices, fruit and port so with some crusty bread lunch will be sorted.  Also purchased some handmade bead jewellery to go with my outfit when we are away in Bournemouth.  Did the rounds of local charity outlets too but came away empty- handed this time.

Returned home and hubby was up and had eaten the breakfast I left for him and we are now back in our usual positions (me on laptop, him watching TV). Have just sent e-mail to my son and his other half to try and organise a meal together as we have not seen them since Christmas and it will be good to catch up.  Grandchildren are doing fine (saw them last weekend) and the eldest passed his hearing test (arranged because he had double ear infection) with flying colours so my daughter now says there is no excuses when he 'pretends' not to hear when she is talking to him.  He continues to love school (even went back in after his hospital appointment even though only an hour of the school day left!) - long may it continue. Baby Zack growing fast and for the most part a happy and laid back little boy (was not so happy after his latest round of jabs bless him).  Now they have replaced their two old cars with one family runaround (13yrs old but running!!!) my daughter is able to visit friends a little further afield and all being well they are going up to visit my son-in-laws Dad and his wife during the Easter holidays which will be their holiday this year.

Bet you are looking foward to having a 'real-time' cuddle with Ava when the family visits and hope you are keeping well and not overdoing it.  I can only imagine what running your own business entails - certainly not much R&R so do take care.  Chat again soon.  Jules xx

Evening Jules,

Thank you for trying to send us a bit of sun, didn't get it but at least the rain stopped to let us dig out a large beech from one end of the hedge and put it further down where there was a pathetic l beech in the hedge. Don't know if it'll take but we've done everything we can, so hopefully fingers crossed.  We had to take the first tree out as the electricity people are coming to put in a new pole and we have asked them to move it and the suggested place was at this end of the hedge. As it was probably the best specimn in the hedge I didn't really want to loose it. Hence the work.

I popped into town at 3.15 once we had had some lunch got back and hubby was fast asleep in bed so left him there for a couple of hours. Did get him to do dinner though so that I could do the upholstery, small job, but now I've run out of nails and one of us will have to pop into town again in the morn so I can finish the job and put stool back before guests arrive tomorrow pm.

Your grandson sounds absolutely lovely and engaging and Baby Zack sounds like a bundle of fun.

Ava had her 3rd lot of jabs this last week and wasn't that happy about it either.

I am definately looking forward to some real cuddles and the chance to get to know each other again.

The other thing I meant to tell you was my son got another job this last Monday. Was so relieved forgot to ask that much about it. !!!!!!!!!!!! What a bird brain am I. ???

And yes you are right, working here self employed is rather like being the cobblers wife. !!!! Last shod.

We are going away at the beggining of March though for 5 days, up to Bonny Scotland.

Sleep well chat again soon.

Annabel xx.