Hi all, my mum bless her soul is dealing with secondary breast cancer and has been receiving treatment for a few years now. Recently she’s been sleeping in a lot longer needing help to take off her bra, just normal everyday tasks. I’m 21 and live at home with her, my dad and my 16 year old sister.

last year my ex partners younger brother received palliative care to which I was present and I think that despite being able to get a better understanding about the end and grief, it’s definitely made me very anxious for when my mum does eventually leave us. It’s very hard to navigate everything and often find that if I think on it too much it just creates a whirl wind of strange feelings and thoughts (almost abit existential).

as of recently I’ve been having some quite distressing dreams, mostly about end of life care but each time it’s someone closer to me passing, or even if it’s not the main dream theme it’ll be someone that I’ve gotten to know leaving/ moving somewhere else. Definitely a bit of a theme of abandonment hahaha. I was wondering if anyone else has experienced anything similar? I tried briefly mentioning it to my family but unfortunately it makes my mum upset (completely understandable) and my sister tells me I shouldn’t be talking to the family about those kinds of things: either keep it to myself or talk to friends. I know that this isn’t a therapy website but it’s definitely a bit of a lonely situation to try and grasp and it would be nice to hear/ talk to people that can understand even if they don’t have advice.

hope your all having a lovely day