Hi MotherMary, 

Your mum does sound so incredibly brave fighting cancer for the last 5 years at the age of 84 starting with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma - she has certainly been through a lot, 4 complete rounds of chemotherapy and all these stays in hospital. I am so sorry to hear that the cancer has now spread all over and what a disappointment it must have been after waiting all this time to find out that the trial wouldn't be suitable for her. This must have been a real blow and it must be hard to know now where you are going from there. 

It's hard to know what the next steps might be in her situation and I would suggest you get in touch with her medical team to try and find out whether she will be able to have more chemotherapy or if there are other treatment options available. I think you both deserve to be informed as soon as possible so that you are no longer in the dark as to what comes next.

I can imagine this feels deeply unfair and if you ever feel like talking to one of our cancer nurses about this, don't hesitate to get in touch with them on this free number 0808 800 4040 - their helpline is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm. 

Other members of our community will be able to relate to how you are feeling at the moment and they may well have been through something similar before and I hope that they will come along shortly and share their experience with you. 

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator