Dads Cancer

My Dads cancer is progressing quite quickly from diagnosis last week, he is now struggling to even drink liquids due to the large tumour which is aparently wrapped right round his oesophagus. He is still waiting for biopsy results on the tumour but has been told its inoperable and he is not fit enough for chemo or radiotherapy so its a matter of just doing what they can to keep him comfortable (although they don't seem to be doing very much at the moment, he is waiting for the MDT to look at everything). I want to have as much info and knowledge as possible to help him,  and to help my Mum through this.   Does anyone have any experience of what to expect from here, or even things I can do to help him?  I'm very conscious that we might not have as long as we hoped with him considering how quickly he is deteriorating so I am trying to just be there as much as possible but I feel so helpless and broken. I am not sure how I am going to cope when it does finally happen, he is my world! Any advice would be really gratefully received. 

  • Welcome to Cancer Chat, Redhead1.

    I’m sorry to hear about your dad and how quickly things have changed. It’s heartbreaking to see someone you love struggling like this, and it’s completely understandable that you’re feeling helpless and broken right now.

    It sounds like you’re doing everything you can by being there for your dad and your mum, and that means more than you might realise. Sometimes, just being present can bring comfort even when words or treatments can’t do much more.

    While you wait for the MDT to meet, you might want to ask if there’s a palliative care or community nursing team that can offer more support at home. They can help with keeping your dad comfortable and making sure both he and your family have the care you need right now.

    You might also find this page on our website helpful as it has information on how cancer affects family and friends. There you can find some suggestions on ways to support your loved ones and yourself during this time.

    Please know you don’t have to face this alone. Others here will understand what you’re going through and can share how they coped with similar experiences.

    Take things gently, one day at a time, and be kind to yourself in between caring for everyone else.

    With best wishes to you and your family,

    Renata, Cancer Chat Moderator

  • Thats really helpful, thanks Renata. I'll look for a community nurse now