Hello Shellbell101, 

Thank you for coming here and sharing your story. I am so sorry your family member's prostate cancer has returned and he now has incurable bone cancer at 56. The agonising pain he is experiencing in his leg sounds awful and it's terrible that he can't walk and has lost all his muscle mass. He should not be in so much pain and I hope that he will get adequate pain relief. 

His situation is so difficult with his worry that his niece might be taken away if he reaches out for help with social services and living in the Isle of Man he is isolated from his family and it's not easy logistically for them to get to him. We have information on our website which might give you some pointers as to who can help and on support that is available at home, GP and community nursing support being one of them. I think given his situation a first good point of contact would be the GP and his specialist team who are looking after him and one thing that needs to be sorted as a priority and that he needs advice on is the agonising pain in his leg and the fact he can no longer walk and it is affecting his quality of life. We have in-depth information on cancer and pain control and on treating cancer pain and talking to the GP about the pain he is in and how to manage it is very important to improve his wellbeing as it must be really hard for him and also for his niece to see him so poorly. 

I would also suggest you give our cancer nurses a call on this free number 0808 800 4040 - their helpline is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm and they may have some good suggestions for you and be able to point you in the right direction. 

It's very nice of you to want to help him and his family and it must be really hard for you to know too what support is available for him in the Isle of Man. I hope that you will hear from others here who will understand your family member's situation and that they will have some good advice for you based on their personal stories.  

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator