Hey everyone, 

I was just hoping someone would be able to give me some advice. I’ve been seeing this guy for about two/three months now and he recently told me he was diagnosed with cancer. I had been extremely worried about him because he had disappeared for a few weeks, only to find out that he had been in hospital after they found some lumps. From the moment he told me about it, he said that he didn’t want to hurt me and it was going to be difficult for me if I wanted to stay around and support him. However, my mum didn’t raise a quitter and I told him that I loved and cared about him and I wasn’t going to abandon him. He was very much appreciative of that and he thanked me. I know it may seem like a short amount of time but we developed such a strong connection and I simply do not want to leave him during such a difficult time. 

However, since learning about all of this, this entire process has been really hard because he will disappear in the early evening due to treatments/being tired and I won’t hear back from him at times. And I feel like he is hot/cold with me. One minute he is talking about his future with me and saying he loves me, and then the next he is shutting me out and disappearing for 24 hours. I just wanted to know if anyone had experience of this when supporting their partner? Also it doesn’t help that we don’t live together, so I can’t exactly see him all the time. I really want to be there for him and to support him the best that I can, but I’m finding it hard when he is pushing me away. I don’t think leaving him would make things better. But does anyone have any suggestions on how I can make things better for us both? 

thanks