Mind is spiralling: worried about my father who has stage 4 lung cancer

My dad has stage 4 lung cancer and was started on Afatinib in September. He has been SO well since this and his scans in October showed a significant response to the treatment. He got what I think was Flu at the beginning of December and just hasn’t been right since. He has now started with the cough again and shortness of breath. I convinced myself he possibly had a lingering chest infection but my mind was working overtime and I managed to get his 3 monthly scan brought forward a few weeks…for reassurance I hope. Over the last day or so, he seems to have gotten abit worse, not enough where he needs to go to hospital but I can’t help but worry his treatment has stopped working. I called today and spoke with a nurse who was being very sketchy on the phone asking what we knew and arranged for him to go to clinic on Monday to see the dr. I’m now extremely anxious that things aren’t good. I’m trying to reassure myself that surely he can’t be fine one day with such a good response to treatment and the next just become so unwell (when I think he had flu) surely if the treatment stopped working it would be a gradual thing? I can’t help but think the worst as much as I’m trying to sway my mind from that. I honestly can’t focus on anything and I’m dreading Monday like I was all those months ago when he was first diagnosed. It feels like torture  

  • Hello Lauraj87, 

    I am so sorry to hear about your dad's stage 4 lung cancer diagnosis and it's great news that his scans showed a significant response to the treatment. It sounds like this potential flu he had hit him hard and it's normal to worry when you noticed this cough and shortness of breath and well done for managing to bring his scan forward by a few weeks - it's important in a situation like this to seek reassurance. I am glad you managed to speak to a nurse - and it can be hard to get information at this busy festive time of year and I am keeping everything crossed for you that it all goes well tomorrow when you see the doctor. I hope that you will get some answers tomorrow and if you would like to talk things through with one of our cancer nurses, don't hesitate to ring their free helpline on this free number 0808 800 4040 - you can call them Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm (except on New Year's day). 

    I hope that they will be able to shed some light tomorrow on what has caused these issues and I am keeping everything crossed for you tomorrow. Waiting for answers or results can be nerve racking and I thought I would share with you our helpful tips on how to cope while waiting for news. I do hope you won't need to wait much longer now and that tomorrow you will find out more. Do keep us updated though if you get a moment on what you find out. 

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator