Hello Lydia123

I'm so very sorry to hear how hard things are for you and your husband at the moment. You've spent a lifetime together and I can only imagine how hard it is to see his health deteriorate and worry about the future. Undoubtedly this is a difficult time. 

It's good to hear that you have a large loving family around you. I know that you want to protect them as much as you can but don't be afraid to share your thoughts and feelings. Although they are also both coping with your husband's decline, I know they will want to support you as much as they can. Communication is so important at times like this so that you can support and comfort each other so don't be afraid to let them know when you're struggling. If your husband is having input from the palliative care team then do lean on them as well. They are there to support you both during this difficult time. 

It's natural that you want to prepare yourself for what the future may look like. Sometimes looking too far head into the unknown can leave us feeling more anxious and worried. Just try to take each day at a time and when the time comes that you are ready to start looking ahead and dealing with the changes, I'm sure that your family will surround you with love and support to help you adjust. 

If it would help at any point to talk with one of our nurses you can call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm (excluding bank holidays). The Cancer Chat community will continue to be here for you if it helps to have a safe space to put down in writing your thoughts, feelings, questions, and concerns or to simply connect with others who understand. We will do all we can to support you. 

I hope that you and your husband are able to spend some time together with the family over the coming festive period. 

Sending you both my very best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator