Absolutely nothing. Sounds bizarre, but imo, i wish someone gave me that advice from the off. I was wanting to be so helpful, i began to irritate my wife, and myself. I felt useless and had zero control over anything. If my wife wanted something, she told me she'd ask, and she did as and when she needed me to do things.

Looking back, I really was overbearing for the first month or so. Me trying to do good deeds just began to add to her stress. She always felt she had to show gratitude etc and she found that took energy. Energy, which she needed just to get over treatments etc. Seriously, don't overthink this part because many people do as did I. Just tell him if he needs something to let you know and you'll be more than happy to oblige.