Hello there, 

I can sympathise with your situation deeply, when my boyfriend was diagnosed with cancer our whole world got flipped upside down. For him, he was taken out of uni, began chemo therapy almost immediately  and has been doing pretty well with treatment all things considered. He has a beautiful family that supports him day in day out and is in amazing hands being taken care of. On the other side, when he was diagnosed I remained at uni, suddenly having to juggle all of the fears and anxieties for my partner from a different city 4 hours away, on top of a job and uni and exams and rent to pay. I feel that as the partner you are left to cope on your own, no one takes you away from your hectic daily life and sorts everything out for you so that you can sit down and process the terrifying situation you have been put in. No one that you talk to can truly understand what you are going through emotionally. It’s not the typical situation you can gossip to your friends about for advice. It is so lonely and scary and you never even really talk to your partner about it, not wanting to burden them with your anxieties on top of the mountain of  their own they’re already probably dealing with. It is a terribly overwhelming and isolating experience and for me, the best solace has been to communicate with others on this forum who can understand my position. It is comforting to know that you are trying your best and others can see. You are doing amazingly, meditation and yoga are healers of the mind and nervous system. You got this!! And so do I xxx