Hi all, my dad has minimal time left and is asking questions I'm really struggling with knowing how to answer without frightening him or just dodging the questions. Any help would be appreciated
Hello Gilbo. I took care of my Mum when she was dying of cancer, but she was never told that it was cancer. The reason was that many years previously, she had told me that if she ever gets 'The Big C' she did NOT want to be told what it was. This of course made it really difficult for me, because I believe that on some subconscious level, my Mum knew what she had, and one day she said to me, "am I dying of cancer?" I honestly did not know how to respond to her question, so I just mumbled something about "of course not Mum, don't be silly". I felt awful for lying to her, but knowing my Mum as I did, I knew that she would not be able to deal with the truth. If you think that your Dad will be able to handle it, then I would advise you to tell him.......BUT if, like my Mum, he would absolutely go to pieces by knowing the truth, then I guess you will have to keep avoiding the question in one way or another. I guess the question you must ask yourself is: "Can my Dad handle the truth or not?"
He does know what he has. His questions are more along the lines of ...will I be in pain, will I not be able to catch by breath, will I become incontinent. How will I know when I'm going to die?
Just really hard to think he all these things going on in his head right now
