Mum diagnosed with terminal oesophagus cancer

So my mum was diagnosed with oesophagus terminal cancer back in March 2023. She was told she had months to a year max to live. Because the extent of her cancer it wasn't just in the oesophagus it traveled to her neck and lymph nodes. So surgery was not an option back then. To help keep it at bay she had a mixture of chemotherapy and immunotherapy. After so many treatments over this year she had go eventually stop the chemotherapy as her body couldn’t take it. Got scans and basically got told a month ago its now travelled the lymph nodes to her outer stomach and possible more trails to her oesophagus. (She also has a stent in too) as she was not able to eat anything a year sgo. But the stent might become an issue if it’s growing more. 

so a month ago she got told she has around 3 months tops to live. And no other treatment will help. As the next stage will the cancer probably spread to her organs such as lungs and kidneys. As my mum is dealing with this in her own way she has refused to get any further scans or treatments. We are already a month down and time is going too fast. My mum has been feeling very tired most days with no energy and now getting some headaches. 

i don't know if these are signs of her dying and are what the doctors said is true? I am getting really scared and worried she is just going to die any day now and I don’t know what major symptoms or signs to look out for. I am also trying to prepare mentally for whats going to happen as i have been going through this for a whole year and it scares me now that she is actually dying any day/week now.. just any advice or similar stories from other people would be much appreciated 

  • Hi Betty01,

    Welcome to Cancer Chat. I'm so sorry to hear of the situation with your mum - this sounds like a lot to process and deal with. It's difficult to answer your question - what the doctors have said so far will be a guideline based on their experience and other similar situations, however each individual is different. I would encourage you to give your doctor a call to discuss how things are at the moment, and also what to potentially look out for. It's important that you can be as prepared as possible in terms of what to expect.

    You are also welcome to give our nurses a call if you feel you'd like to talk things through. You can reach them on freephone 0808 800 4040 - Monday-Friday, 9-5 (excluding bank holidays).

    Macmillan could also be a helpful resource - the information on their site as well as their own helpline.

    Aside from this, I hope that this forum can be of some help to you and that you get some more replies to your post here soon. You can also search the forum (using the bar at the top of the page) for other relevant discussions, if you would like to.

    Wishing you all the best,

    Cancer Chat Moderator

  • Hi Betty,

    So sorry to read your Mum’s news. We went through something similar with my Mum.
    Has she been referred to MacMillans or Maggies? If not, her GP can arrange that.
    Being pragmatic, with a terminal diagnosis it helps to know the patient’s end of life preferences as early as possible.
    My Mum was scared of hospitals, so we arranged for home hospice care with MacMillan and Marie Curie. It took a while to arrange though.

    Good luck