Hello Bellally, 

I completely understand what you mean - it's not because your mum is 90 that she should be left alone without being seen by anyone. Your mum is lucky to have you there by her side to make sure she gets the medical attention she needs, for example when you had the out of hours doctor out last week when she was not eating or drinking. Make sure you make your voice heard so that she gets all the help she deserves - get in touch with her GP for example and explain the situation and that you feel she deserves more than that. You definitely should have access to a district nurse or a palliative care nurse so make sure you insist on that too. Our website has a useful page on support at home that may be available to you so don't hesitate to knock on all the doors to get as much help as possible during this extremely challenging time. You can also look into getting in touch with a Marie Curie nurse - they give nursing care to people with advanced cancer in their own homes. They can visit during the day or spend the night to give carers a break.

I hope this helps a little and that you will hear from other members of our community who have been in a similar place before and that they will be happy to share their story with you. I hope you won't mind but I have changed the title of your thread slightly so that it can be spotted more easily by others who find themselves in the same situation. 

Best wishes, 

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Thanks lucie very much for your advice I'm going to ask the district nurses about mums catheter should be checked I no I'm here but I've not been trained for certain things I drain it yes but that's it .