Partner just diagnosed with neck cancer

My partner has just been diagnosed with neck cancer.  I have a 10 day break in Japan next week before any treatment starts.  He has a great support system from colleagues and friends and one friend says he will come and stay for a while.  I really need a break but of course when I return he will get my full attention.  I do feel guilty but very stressed too.

  • Hello Urbanlily

    I'm sorry to hear about your partner's recent diagnosis. It's naturally a worrying and stressful time for you both. 

    It's great to hear that your partner has such a good support system around him. I'm sure that that will stand you both in good stead over the coming months whilst he's undergoing treatment. 

    I presume that you and your partner have spoken about your impending trip as you've mentioned that one friend is going to come and stay for a while whilst you're away. Hopefully, the trip will be the break that you need and you'll return fully refreshed and ready to support him once his treatment starts. It's not uncommon for people who are caring for a loved one to feel guilty about taking time for them but it's important to remember that you need to look after yourself in order to be able to give them the best that you can. We have some information about this on our website here

    Do keep in touch when your partner starts his treatment if you need some advice or support. We have quite a few members who have been through treatment for head and neck cancers and they really are a great source of information to others who find themselves on this journey. 

    Best wishes, 
    Cancer Chat moderator 

  • Thank you for taking the time to reply.  Much appreciated. x

  • Once again thank you for your reply.  My partner and I went to the hospital to get his treatment plan.  The good thing, if there is such a thing, is that his cancer P16 positive and according to the oncologist it should be treatable, but of course no guarantees.  I must say the treatment sounds a bit gruesome.  I know my partner is very nervous and a bit depressed.  In fact he cried in the middle of the night and I did too,  I so hope he can manage this treatment and that I can be strong enough to support him.  I am feeling quite devastated at the moment.