Hey Rob.

I can fully identify with how you are feeling. It's tough. I have so many questions and what-ifs running through my brain.

Is it even worth having hope? I might as well give up on being helpful and trying to care really

Hi Rob. Everything you're feeling and going through right now is completely normal. You definitely aren't alone in this. There's no right or wrong way to feel. You don't need to feel guilty about anything.

Hi Lee, the bad days are tough. One day I’m low and find it hard to be positive and then the next is not so bad. It’s my temper at the moment. I’m like a fire cracker. Things that wouldn’t bother me before now get so far under my skin I feel like I’m going to loose it. I hope you are coping and keep your head held high

I’m so glad I found this post. As I can really relate. I am not an angry person and always like to see it from the other person side. But since my mum was given the terminal diagnosis and put on end of life care in Nov, I have had it building up in me. 

It has been such a confusing time, being told weeks and her still being here today. I am so grateful to have this time but at the same I worry about her quality of life. She doesn’t leave the house now. 
mum first got diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer, being told they caught it and was able to operate. Then that she needed chemo/radiation. To now having stage 4 bowel cancer. I really wanted a second opinion but mum just accepted it and wanted to go home to pass. She is struggling with still being here and I just feel so guilty with having these feelings of anger/frustration about the whole situation. 
I think I’m beginning to realise unfortunately it is just part of the process and to accept the anger will be there. 

I hope you are doing ok and are being kind to yourself. As hard as it is just accepting the bad days and celebrating the good. I hope the people around are able to support and understand you will be up/down, do take care.