Dealing with mums cancer

Hi all

Im not sure where to turn or if anyone can help? My mum was diagnosed on 8th Feb with a large tumour in her breast and cancer in her lymph nodes. She has had a successful mastectomy and lymph node clearance and is starting radiotherapy at the end of May. Mum is 80 but still full of life. She is recovering well but needs a lot more day to day care than previously. I work full time but she only lives 5 mins away so I am managing to fulfil the caring side of things. Dad passed away last year and I'm their only child. Even though recovery is going well I am feeling very low and struggling to cope with these feelings. Surely I should be happy she is recovering and doing so well (I'm so proud of how she has coped). I had to take time off work this week as I hadn't slept, am struggling to eat as well and just couldn't cope with going into the office. Is this something other carers have felt?? Why am I not able to be happy she is well??

  • Hi Tina and welcome to the Cancer Chat community.

    I'm glad to hear your mum's treatment has gone well although I'm sorry you're finding it difficult to cope with how you're feeling at the moment.

    Being a carer can be very tough and sometimes thoughts and feelings can creep up on you unexpectedly, especially when you're working full time and putting the needs of others first. I'm sure some of our members who have been in a similar position will share their experiences and advice with you soon but in the meantime, I just wanted to share this information we have for carers. I hope you find it useful, but if you'd like to discuss this further with one of our nurses, you can do so on 0808 800 4040, Monday - Friday between 9a.m - 5p.m. They're very supportive and will do all they can to help.

    I know you said you're managing with the practical side of things at the moment but if you would like to find out what other support may be available to you and mum, just click here.

    Be kind to yourself Tina and if you can, try to take some time to give yourself some much deserved TLC.

    Kind regards,

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator