My dad is currently in a care home due to a devastating brain injury and due to us finding out a few months ago that my mum has terminal cancer out of the blue so can not care for him anymore at home. She today has finally said she can not cope at home any more as she is so poorly and agreed to go into the same home as my father. She was also taken into hospital today due to an infection. We live 2 hours away and i dont drive and have two young children one not of school age.

My husbands mother is no longer speaking to me as she believes i was not greatful enough to her during the week I stayed over to care for my father to stop him being taken into care while my mother was taken to hospital and diagnosed with cancer. They looked after our children on a few days and I was deemed not grateful enough and called an ungrateful so and so and simce then she has had no contact and even ignores me in the street. She has never liked me or my famiy in the 11 urs we have been together and has always been "involved" more so simce we moved house and are a 10 min walk away.

Tonight I told my husband I would have to go over this weekend to empty the fridge sort out security for the house and see my parents in the home as we hope my mum will be discharged by then. I haven't seen them for 2 months due to my mum fearing she may catch something from us while going through chemo and I think trying to hide how poorly she was. His response was OK, but I felt like he wasn't committing to coming with me it felt off so I pushed and said will you be coming with me. He said no I want to be with my mum on mother's day you have the kids with you so what's your problem and then was very cild to me (i think in defense of the fact he knows this is wrong so is gojng on the attack). I felt devastated I explained it was a huge thing going into back to my family home  knowing my parents will never set foot back into it and going to see them knowing now how poorly my mum is and to physically see that and process it. But he refused to talk about it anymore. I said calmly I hope you never have to experience this but if you do I hope you have someone by your side who is there for you. He then spat out at me if I have to go I will but I will be setting back early Sunday to be with my mum (that would mean we all come back as due to train shortages it would take me 6 hours to get home on a sunday with 2 kids with me. I said this is my last mother's day with my mum, why wouldn't your reaction be of course I will come with you but is there any chance we can leave no later than 3pm so I can get a few hours with my mum.

I am just so shocked as I feel I am going to lose both parents this year and my husband clearly puts his mother first even in these circumstances and sees nothing wrong with this. My mental response and physical response is so strong to this being very wrong that i dont feel i can stay with him as he clearly doesnt love care or respect me in a time of such extreme pain. I was quietly sobbing and said I really needed him to be there for his support and he turned over went to sleep saying I am bot changing my mind I want to be with my mum on mother's day.