Hi, I just read your post and thought "Wow, I've been there, done that" so here I am. Primary lung cancer, stage 4 with spread to a brain tumour, just like your partner.

I used to work on computers before I retired, so I'm into doing my documentation. With that in mind, here are the notes I made at the time when I was exactly at the stage your partner is at now... (doctors and consultants names redacted)

Answers from Dr XXX (brain tumour doctor) 22nd February:

Can I expect overall 100% recovery?
  Yes
If not, what might I notice?
  Nothing
I have noticed a watery sloshing noise from my nose when going to toilet
  Noises in the head are normal after head surgery (it'll go)
What can I do starting now/later to improve my outcome?
  Stay fit and healthy
Is there anything I should avoid doing right now?
  Heavy exercise (that's a given!)
What happens with the void where the tumour was?
  It gets smaller but it stays and fills with fluid
What about what was done to stop bleeding - was anything in my brain oxygen-starved?
  No, all ok
Will I reach a point when I think I'm 100% but REALLY have further to go?
  Yes (so be careful!) It may take up to a year to really fully recovered
What after-care/after-treatment will I need?
  Follow-up radiotherapy on the left-over bits that were on the edges
  Plan is to scan on 7th Mar, treat on 14th, but dates may well change.

Q & A for Mr XXX (lung tumour surgeon)

What happens to the hole in my skull and how big is it?
  Oval, approx 2x3cms. Put back and screwed in place with MRI-friendly screws.
  It will heal up and the screws will stay.
How long does that take to heal, if at all?
  10 days or so. The sutures will dissolve.
When will it be safe to wash the area and/or shower?
  It already is.
What was the collateral damage from just getting at the tumour?
  Minimal, it was to non-vital brain tissue.

Let's see, anything else I can add? I got told I should be recovered from the brain surgery after 6 months; my own self-assessment was closer to a year for complete recovery. It feels well wierd - some stuff works and some doesn't. My damage was in the left parietal lobe. The brain is impressive, though - it rewires itself if pushed and given time.

The drugs available for lung cancer treatment now are truly astounding, and more are coming available all the time. Realistically I'd say rather than hope for a cure right now just expect a treatment to keep your partner going until the next best thing becomes available, which could be sooner than you would think. So, not quite a cure right now, but the next best thing. Stay positive.

Kind regards
Steve

Thank you for taking the time to reply to my post. Unfortunately things have been tough lately and his headrush as he calls it has gotten worse than ever. He has been told to decrease the dexamethasone so now 2mg every other day, it's only been three weeks from surgery so still early days, he is eating past himself which I've been told is due to the steroids but his breathing is becoming rapidly worse. He starts chemo for the lungs on Tuesday next week.
I feel he is slowly declining as the first week after surgery he seemed much better than now. I spoke to his nurse today and she seems to think this is quite normal, but we truly felt after removing the tumour his symptoms would slowly fade, he is still agitated, confused sometime and gets very angry with me in particular, he apologises as he knows he can't help it and I am very patient as I can tell it's not him deep down. 

Kind regards and wishing you all the best. 

Hi,

As you say, it's still early days so expect progress to be slow. Yes, the tumour is out now but the job probably isn't quite finished yet - after my brain tumour was cut out the lining of the hole left behind, or tumour bed, was irradiated daily for 3 days to delicately burn out the very last bits. All of that work will come with its own side effects on top of the residuals from the steroid, surgery and the original tumour. There will be no instant bounce back to normal and slow progress will not always be steady so believe it when the nurse says his recovering is quite normal. The main thing to remember is that you will both get through this.

kind regards
Steve