What is happening? Is my dad nearing the end?

Hi everyone. 
 

I'm caring for my 71yr old dad at home. He has prostate cancer that has spread to his bones. He is on palliative care, and mum and I are trying to do the best we can. 
He was discharged from hospital on 18th Jan 2022 into palliative care, and I have been watching him daily.

I have no idea what to expect, or how much longer he has (I know there is no definitive answer here). His breathing varies from shallow to numerous bouts of apnea. He can stop breathing for up to 30 seconds, and then catch it and start again. 
He is on a catheter, and his urine has now gone dark brown with some clots in (the nurses say this is normal). He hasn't eaten in nearly a month, but still drinks water. 
His mind wanders quite a lot, and he sleeps nearly 22 hours a day. 
 

Can anyone help me with their experiences of what is happening? 
 

Thank you 

  • Hello CaringAtHome

    I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad's situation. It's obviously an incredibly difficult time for you and your Mum at the moment. It's good to know that you do have input from the palliative care team and I hope that you feel supported by them. 

    I know it's been a couple of days since you posted on the forum and the situation may have changed but we do have some information on our website here that you may find helpful. 

    If you want to chat with our nurses at any point you're welcome to call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm. 

    Thinking of you at this difficult time. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

  • Hi 

    im really sorry to read about your father. My father is in the same situation but does not have a catheter.

    my father also sleeps most of the days eats nothing but drinks water or sips on water. 

    He was eating one mouth full a day for a while but has totally stopped.

    my fathers condition has slowly deteriorated over the course of a 6 weeks. The doctors said 2-3 weeks 6 werks ago as a time scale.

    He has carried on fighting till the day but he is weak some days are better then pthers he may say a few words or ask about something but most days will just lie in bed and we can see his mind wonder through his eyes. 

    I pray that god gives you the strength to get through this difficult time