My mum was diagnosed with ovarian cancer roughly 6 weeks ago. Sadly it has metastasised and it's in her peritoneum. Itwas already in her peritoneum at diagnosis, as well as in her stomach. The consultant described it as "an abdomen full of cancer. Everything is coated in cancer". She hasn't been able to eat for some weeks now. The last time I saw her eat anything that was a proper meal was at least two months ago, probably 3. She's at a stage where she can't even sip water without vomiting, as she had a cancerous mass blocking her stomach. She has terrible ascites. Her lower legs are now swelling. She's lost so much weight and she was only tiny to start with. She's currently in hospital. She is so weak she cannot stand and cannot walk. She was given one lot of chemo two weeks ago. A very mild form. The mildest they can give because of how weak she already was from weeks of not eating. However the situation is worse not better. She isn't on any kind of nutrition drip in hospital. The only treatments she gets are ascities draining when needed, and anti sickness meds. She is supposed to take antibiotics to prevent her getting a urine infection,but I found out yesterday she's flushing them down the toilet once the nurses have left. The problem I have is that I don't think she has much longer to live, but no one has told her this because she hasn't asked. Apparently, according to one nurse I spoke to, they can only tell the patient what the patient asks about, and as she hasn't asked the severity, she hasn't been told. She doesn't have internet, but all my searching of research papers etc, the situation is looking dire. How can I help her to understand that this probably isn't going to get better. She's in total denial and thinks it's all going to be fine, despite the fact that she's skeletal, vomits up anything that she tries to eat, and is very obviously unwell. Should I leave her in ignmorant bliss? Will there come a point when doctors will lay out the facts, or will they just keeptrying to keep her alive as long as possible. When the doctor said they would try chemo, it was descibed as 'to control the cancer and make you comfortable', which I take to mean palliative. Will there come a point where this will stop because it's clear she won't live? At what point does this come? I love mymum dearly but seeing her so desperately ill, yet so hopeful, breaks my heart and I have no idea what to do for the best for her when it comes to talk of the future. At the moment I keep as positive as I can and divert coversations about the future, or should I just go along with what she thinks is going to happen?
