I can feel your pain my dad had a huge heart attack 5 days before Christmas and hearing the Christmas music was hard l didn't want to be jolly, l wanted him to get better and be home. 
Try to take care of yourself so you can support others, this is a situation none of us want to be in and Christmas some how makes it worst.

I am sending my thoughts and hugs, the care team should be able to help you or Macmillan. 
susie

Hey Sarah,

I am so so sorry to hear about your dads diagnosis and terrible prognosis. I can fully understand how deeply painful and difficult this is to come to terms with. 
 

My dad was also my rock, my pillar and my strength. My best friend. He always knew what I was thinking and feeling just by looking me in the eyes. He was diagnosed with cancer back in May. Last month, things took a turn for the worst and 2 weeks ago we got told his cancer is now terminal and there is multiple organ failure. It's like the ground crumbles beneath you and your world is falling apart...and that's before it's even happened. He sadly passed away yesterday after rapid deterioration.

You have to take this one day at a time and start putting support structures in place for yourself. Spend as much time as you can with him, even if it's just sat by his side and holding his hand. Every second counts so savour it. Take this time to ask him all the questions you've ever wanted to ask - his favourite memories, any forgotten passions or dreams he has, any stories from childhood he's never shared. It's so painfully tough but the one good thing that comes from this horrific situation is the time to be able to ask the things you've never asked and say the things you want to say so there are no regrets. I held my dads hand all through the night before he passed, and saw his eyes looking into mine even in the dark. I told him what he meant to me and though the pain is immense, im glad I got to say goodbye properly. 
 

I completely understand the feeling of resentment when you look around and people are happy around their loved ones. It's not fair, no one understands and it's such an isolating experience. It's completely ok to feel these things and know you have support here.

sending so much love and strength to you and your family. Everything will be ok xxx

Thank you for your lovely words and I'm sorry that you too have experienced this also. 

So edit to my post he passed away today surrounded by all his family till his very last breath. 

He's finally free from cancer and pain and I feel so delighted I was there and said goodbyes. 

Thanks for your lovely words xx

Hi SarahMac, 

I just saw your post and wanted to offer my deepest condolences for your loss.

I'm so glad all of you were able to be with your dad when he passed and I hope you can take some comfort from knowing that he is at peace and no longer in any pain.

I'm sure Alfiestar and Nillyvanilli will offer their support to you soon but in the meantime I just want you to know your post has been seen and we're thinking of you at this difficult time.

Kind regards,

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator