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The end stages - my son, 43, has terminal lung cancer. He's lost a lot of weight, eats & drinks little, sleeps a lot and can get confused. Is he near the end?

Tony1
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Hi, our son is 43, he has terminal lung cancer, he is down to 4 stone 10 pound, he still tries to eat a little cereal every day, and is drinking perhaps two glasses of water at most a day, he has been sleeping for hours (sometimes like 12-15 hours a day), he has been confused sometimes, these and other symptoms have been going on for over three weeks now, my questions is. Is he very near the end of life, or could he go on like this for months?

Thank you

  • Hello Tony1 and thanks for your post,

    I am so very sorry to hear about your son and I can only imagine what a hard time this must be for your family. It is very difficult for me to predict how long this will all go on for and I am sure that it is very difficult for you to watch. If your son has a palliative/Macmillan nurse then you could talk to them. The palliative team are there to not only support the patient but the family as well. His palliative team may have more of an idea of your son's outcome particularly if they are seeing him on a regular basis.

    Whilst your son is continuing to drink fluids and he is awake for some of the time then he may continue to go on for a few more weeks.

    We have some general pages on our website about the last few weeks and days which you might find helpful to look at.

    You may also find it helpful to read Marie Curie last few weeks of life.

    I do hope that your family is feeling well supported during this very painful time.

    You are very welcome to ring and chat through any of this with one of the helpline nurses. The number to call is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm.

    All the best,

    Catherine

  • Offline in reply to CRUK Nurse Catherine

    Hi Cathrine

    Thank you for your reply 

    I’ve read what to expect, but my son has been showing the symptoms of the last few days of life for two weeks now.

    Its a confusing and scary time.

  • in reply to Tony1

    Hello Tony, and thank you for coming back to us.

    Everyone is different, but when someone is younger this end of life phase can sometimes go on for a bit longer.

    As Catherine has said it would be great if you could talk to the palliative care team who are involved with his care. This is because they are expert's in patients like your son. If your son does not have one, do talk to his doctor about referring him.

    Take care of yourself Tony at this very difficult time.

    Sarah.

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