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Advice from people with cancer, is my fear holding me back?

daisy77777
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I’m really concerned about making this post here, because I don’t want to offend anyone or make people feel bad.

I’m 16 years old, and I don’t have a cancer diagnosis. But, I have been struggling with anxiety and depression, and am currently considering going to my GP for medication after being advised by my counsellor.

One part of my anxiety is the fear of getting cancer. I want to go to university and am currently studying my A-levels, but I’m so paralysed by the fear of getting cancer young, and having to put off or even lose the chance of getting my education. It’s like a self fulfilling prophecy at this point, because this fear is causing my studies to suffer.

I am just so terrified of getting cancer young. Not to undermine the experience of those who get it older, it’s terrifying at any age! But, I am just so scared of the treatment, its side effects, the risk of losing my life, and having the essential put my life on hold and accept a ‘new normal’. I don’t think I’d be able to handle it and have to put off or risk losing out on my dreams. And, I don’t think I’d mentally be able to recover afterwards even if I did survive.

It sounds ridiculous, but I’m so scared of getting cancer that I’ve started experiencing suicidal thoughts, since I’m starting to think it would be easier to die now then get cancer.

Sorry for rambling, but I guess my question is to people with cancer right now, young or old, should I really be letting this fear hold me back? How difficult is treatment and moving on/finding yourself after cancer?

I know this site is for cancer patients, not for those suffering with anxiety. But, I wanted to hear from people who actually have the disease, since I feel their insights might give me more clarity. 

Thanks, and I hope this hasn’t offended anyone!!

  • in reply to daisy77777

    Hello daisy7777and thank you for your further posting,

    I encourage you to go and speak with your GP as my colleague Sarah mentioned.

    They will be able to assess you and also help with the anxiety you are feeling, so do let them know what you are worried about and how anxious this is making you feel and affecting you every day.

    It is also worth getting support from the organisations mentioned such as MIND .

    No one on here can give you a diagnosis; I'm afraid only a doctor who can assess you can.

    Take care, and I really hope you can get support with this,

    Jemma

  • Offline in reply to MargaretMary

    Thank you all for your advice!

    I’ve spoken with my mother and we are currently trying to call the doctor about my symptoms, but haven’t told her about what me and my counsellor discussed yet, I’m too nervous.

    I’m so scared to go to the doctors, I haven’t been to the doctors for myself before, and I don’t know what to expect. I’m so scared that it’s going to be serious and that I’m going to have to drop out of my A-levels.

    I know it’s not the end of the world, but I really value my education, and I love the school I am at currently, and if I end up being sick for too long, i won’t be able to study there. I don’t want to fall behind, I want my A-levels over and done with and I want to go to university.

    I am so scared.

  • Offline in reply to daisy77777

    You should be able to get a phone consultation with your GP,  and you might find this more comfortable to talk in the comfort of your own home than in the surgery.

    I wouldn't plan ahead too much about what you are going to say to the GP, just go with the flow at the time.

    You could also plan what to do about talking to the GP with your counsellor...

    Good luck

  • Offline in reply to Hopecalm

    Thank you!!

  • in reply to daisy77777

    Hello Daisy77777

    We're glad to hear that you've spoken with your Mum about how you're feeling and that you're trying to make an appointment to speak with your GP about the anxiety that you've been dealing with recently. This is certainly a positive step in the right direction. Hopefully, along with the counselling support that you're receiving, you will be able to begin to move forward. 

    With the positive steps that you have already taken to seek support with your anxiety now would be the right time to step away from the Cancer Chat forum as well. Spending time posting and reading content on a cancer forum such as Cancer Chat will exacerbate your anxiety which is counterproductive to the help that you are seeking with your GP and counsellor. 

    The forum is here for people affected by cancer who need help or support. We have previously given you suggestions for other forums you can use and places where you can seek support for your mental health and anxiety and we'd strongly encourage you to seek support from those organisations which are more appropriate. 

    We really hope you get the help you need to enable you to better manage your anxiety but that isn’t something that Cancer Chat can help with.

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

  • Offline in reply to Moderator Jenn

    Thank you,

    Yes, I think you are right. Thank you for your support!

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