Lying about cancer

Hi ,so basically I had a friend who told me they had found d a lump in he’s testicle and it was cancer and that it had been surgically removed! He then went on to tell me that he had an appointment with the doctors to then find out if the cancer had spread any where else or disappeared for good!!

tbis whole process of them finding the cancer,the removal of it and the final appointment happened in the space of 4 months

I have other reasons to believe that this is untrue ,would appreciate some help on this 

thank you !!

  • Hi,

    I’m sorry, but your post is confusing.

    Am I right in thinking that, at the the time he talked to you, he: 

    was in the UK
    was receiving NHS treatment
    had had his cancer surgically removed
    hadn’t had pre-op chemo
    hadn’t had radiotherapy
    was awaiting the results of the biopsy on the mass removed during surgery?

    The timescales aren’t absolutely impossible on the NHS - but no-one with cancer ever has a “final appointment”. It’s always more “what should happen next?”


    I hope this helps!
    Dave

  • Thank you for you’re response!

    he never had pre-op chemo ,yes was in the uk,no radiotherapy,….he said it had been removed and the “last” appointment was to tell him if it had spread anywhere else even though he told me that it had been removed ?

  • Playing devil's advocate here. Not sure about the entire timescale, but what i do know, if caught early, which many are, testicular cancer is one of the better cancers insofar as treatment and prognosis goes. A lot of testicular cancers just require the removal of the testicle and maybe a lymph or 2 to double-check and that is that. No chemo, no nothing. 

    If in doubt, ask for some proof e.g.correspondence. Other than that, no one can really claim he's lying either way. If they refuse and you deem yourself close enough to the individual to ask such a thing, them not providing anything to back up their claim may give you the answer you seek. As for the "final appointment", there isn't a final appointment. But not everyone takes everything in and misunderstandings can and do happen. Again, that proves nothing. When i was sat in appointment with my wife, what she was hearing and what i heard were sometimes two different conversations.

  • He has no proof of letter and is a pathological liar.he mentioned he’s girlfriend knew yet when I called in he’s “final appointment “ he was around her and acted sheepish like he couldn’t talk around her ….i then asked he’s girlfriend and her response was “he’s telling me what he’s telling you” I mean surely he would of received letters etc 

  • Yeah, everyone gets correspondence. Whether it be via email, letter or texts. The NHS as a whole is rather poor when doing everything in unison, so even though my wife requested emails, she still got physical letters from other parts of the NHS regarding her treatment.

    Surely his gf knows? I mean, and i apologise for coming across as crude, but he either has one ball or has 2. The removal of the affected testicle is how they remove the cancer and why it has a high cure rate. They don't just remove 30% etc, they remove the entire thing. You not knowing is one thing, his gf not knowing is something else entirely. Not exactly something us guys can hide. Kinda akin to a woman claiming only having one breast. Easy to hide from the outside, but when living with someone or having any sort of intimate relationship, not something anyone can hide.

  • Offline in reply to ProfBaw

    I agree - it’s definitely a binary thing. 
    0 = a testicle has been removed = truthful
    1 = he still has two = liar

  • Thank you I really appreciate you’re feedback!

    exactly my thinking that he’s GF would know this with either the amount of testicles that remain and paper trail ,also her response when I asked was very telling!

    thank you

  • Hello and thank you for posting.

    I am afraid I am unable to say whether your friend is lying about possibly having cancer. Things within the NHS are taking longer than previously, so the time frame is not unusual.

    Do allow your friend to talk things through, as this may be true, or this could be a sign of an underlying struggle with their mental health.

    Take care,

    Sarah

  • Thank you Sarah ,I understand the whole MH aspect but there’s more to this story than I have revealed.

    He went through a rough patch and dragged everyone down with him and told multiple lies,this believe to be off of them