Dear Jemma

Thank you so much for this detailed reply. I will phone those numbers. All support possible is needed right now!

I managed go shopping and buy a load of low fibre foods that were on a list the cancer nurses at the hospital sent me. Managed to eat.

I still have no appetite and am not eating much but am glad I got food down and am (for now at least) not too nauseous.

Hi James, sorry you are going through this, same here, colonoscopy on 14th Dec revealed bowel cancer. Had CT, awaiting MRI. Am a non meat eater but I do eat fish, which makes things a bit easier. Do you eat eggs? Cottage cheese maybe, I know how hard it is when used to a high fibre diet. I totally lost my appetite,  just couldn't eat, lost about half a stone around colonoscopy.  Appetite better now, but it's hard. It's like getting hit by a bus, I find it very difficult and every morning have an awful sinking feeling when I wake up. Hang in there, step by step things do get better, meeting the consultant was a big one for me. The waiting is a torment, but try and distract yourself if you can and be kind to yourself. 

Dear Lauren

Thank you so much for sharing. I'm sorry you are having the same issue- it does help to know it's not unusual and that we both have this issue.

I don't eat any meat or fish, but am resigned to maybe having to do so for now. It's been about 8 years for me, so will be weird. I bought some chicken soup, so might try it, to get more protein.

Eggs, cheese and tofu seem to be my main options, all of which I eat bit don't fancy at the moment.

I do have a (vegetarian) protein powder that I drink with plant milk after sport. Might have that.

I know what you mean about the sinking feeling. And the waiting.

I hope that your plan comes together and your treatment goes well.

Hi James, it's hard, when anaemic I was all set to eat liver, but couldn't quite do it. Not eaten meat since i was around 15, am 53! See how you go, maybe introduce fish initially? Or like you say, protein shakes or yoghurt, if not too nauseating. I know a few weeks ago I was just retching all the time, that was pure anxiety. Thanks, hope you get a scan appointment very soon, it's quite the rollercoaster we find ourselves on.

I seem to have settled down a bit on diet and have got something of an appetite back.  Mostly I try to little and often.

I seem to have stopped losing weight and to have put a little back on. Having cut out most fibre, my BMs are small and soft or liquid, so not too much trouble to pass them.

I'm still very worried about it all, but am trying to take the small victory of being able to eat ok (if not quite how I'd like).

I'm being told by the hospital that the MDT will hopefully discuss my case on Friday, and that the have results back from biopsies, CT and MRI. So I guess I should be having discussions soon about the exact diagnosis and treatment plan? Does that sound right? I'm so scared it will be bad news and/or very complex and that it has spread.

Hi James, such good news about the weight. I think it's totally normal to fluctuate through anxiety,  I definitely did and do. Hang on in, the waiting,  scans etc is so difficult and it's human nature to go to a dark place. Treatments are so advanced now though, we have that on our side.

Timescales sound right, I had CT and MRI then met the consultant after MDT. Am now waiting for operation date. You will honestly feel so much better with a plan.Try and distract yourself best you can until then.

Thank you so much, Lauren.

Yes, I am struggling to manage my fears and anxiety. People are advising, like you are, that this is mentally the hardest time and it gets easier once a plan comes together. I'm just so terrified about how complex it might be and the risk of some element not being treatable. I'm trying to stay positive.

How are you doing? Are they doing various treatment for you ahead of the surgery?

Hi James, I had a bit of a scan rollercoaster, CT, which was OK aside from an indeterminate liver lesion, so I needed an MRI. Like you,  I spiralled, but it was a benign cyst. So current plan is for operation first, possibly chemo after if any lymph nodes involved. I have had 2 iron infusions due to the anaemia.

It is human nature to think the worst. In my head, mine was inoperable and all over. Even if there is some spread though, it does remain treatable. Waiting for operation I do find myself fretting it's going to spread in the following weeks, so I totally understand how easy it is for these fears to latch on. It's an enormous shock. But trust you are in the hands of experts, this is a well worn path for them.

Thinking of you. I find walking helps me when it gets too much. Whatever gets you through, you are v close now to a plan.

Hello James 4000 and thanks for getting back to us again.

At the MDT all the different doctors involved in your care will meet to discuss your case.

They will discuss your biopsies and any scans that you have had and then work out how best to treat your cancer. They will take in to account your general health and how you would cope with any treatment.

We have a page on our website about how treatment decisions are made.

It can help to have a read through the link above so you have more of an idea about what the doctors may discuss with you after the MDT.

If you would like to talk through any of this with the nurses on the helpline you are very welcome to give us a call. I can understand how settling it can be waiting for the doctors to get back to you but try if you can to take one step at a time.

Our helpline number is 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm.

Best wishes,

Catherine