Mum has stage 4 terminal cancer

My mym got diagnosed about a year ago with stage 4 terminal cancer. She had a brain tumor removed but there was still bits they couldn't get wich she says have not grown. She also has lung cancer wich they was going to operate on but then havnt. She is currently having chemo each week if her bloods are ok. But lately I noticed that she is breathing badly she can't walk more than 6 steps without stopping and pain. Her ankles are swollen. She has not been able to eat and throws up after a few mouth fulls. She  been put on 2 different types of anti sickness tablets. And is after 3 days having the same problems again already. And also she said today her legs sore she gets dizzy when going to bathroom and that's all she can do. And also says her legs keep shaking. Just wondering what this all means if it's a sign she isn't going to be here much longer. Is it the cancer or the chemo. Because I know she don't tell me everything to stop me worrying so much but I see on this site that it supposed to indicate someone who is dying. When she has no carer at all or no palative care just don't understand.

  • Hello and thanks for your post,

    I am sorry to hear about your mum and I can understand how very difficult this must be for you if she does not share how she is feeling.

    I would try and encourage your mum to speak to her GP to see if she can get some palliative care in the community. I know without your mum's permission the GP won't speak to you about her condition but you could talk to the GP about your concerns. The palliative care nurse is there to support your mum and also family members.

    I can't say whether her symptoms are related to the chemotherapy or her cancer but if she is having chemotherapy once a week it would be good to go with your mum and if you have a chance you could let the doctors and nurses know about your concerns.

    You may find it helpful to look at the information on the Macmillan website about the support your mum may be able to get. We have some more information about support at home on our website that your mum maybe able to access through her GP.

    I know that it is not easy looking after a close family member but I do hope that you are managing to get some support for yourself.

    If you would like to talk things through with one of the helpline nurses then you are welcome to give us a ring. Our number is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm.

    All the best,

    Catherine