last year I was very unwell with watery stools many times a day and severe pain in the right side of my abdomen, nausea so bad and I felt ashamed ( i know not to be now ) I did the stool sample and qfit and i did not know until end of feb the results ( I got very critically ill with a totally unrelated thing and was close to not making it. 56 days i. hospital and a lot of my abdominal wall was removed .

sepsis took hold and i had severe brain fog so i totally forgot the whole thing until a friend told me 

when i had a follow up with my consultant they said k had missed a colonoscopy i was like what do you mean and he said about  inflammation found on my test results ( when i registered at a new gp i saw results and was in shock . 

my calprotectin was 1800 and my qfit was abnormal but can’t remember the result

they removed a mass on the right side of my abdomen also during the first surgery of 4 . so that was what i added up to when i knew about the pains in my abdomen 

i have a gross thinning of the abdominal wall and so have an incisional hernia not helping the abdominal pain and i have painkillers as have chronic pain all over too ( being investigated as now complex health ) 

I had a virtual colonoscopy in march which showed loss of haustration in the descending colon . 

I have extreme fatigue and my dad does all the house stuff and i’ve also lost a blood clot which was about a 10p size roughly the formed part and  My stools vary now from a mushy sludge to completely constipated which i have laxatives for .

i never feel like i’ve finished going and i’ve been going a lot in amount when in the toilet and it often fills the water if that makes sense . i would get off and then know I would go more so it could be 10 mins sometimes and it has started to feel differently like it’s just blowing out of me like i say that’s hard to explain .

my qfit this time was a lot less but my gp called me in and said i needed to be seen by colerectal urgent under the 2 week wait and have camera both ends .

this was tuesday and I was just so exhausted i had to get a taxi and even using crutches i can usually manage but recently i hardly get out of bed . 

my bloods were fine so it ruled out deficiencies in iron b12 and something else .

I was 17.7 stone last march ,  then march this year i was 13 stone and despite icu and all the 56 days in hopsital i still feel that js a lot of weight loss

i often feel a sharp stabbing in my back passage like something is being jabbed inside of me 

I have problems passing urine 

I have no appetite so i never feel full either 

My sister has chrons and i’m aware of ibd being genetic sometimes but I don’t think this is . I don’t self diagnose but having severe anxiety especially over my health I just want the tests done now and i’ll deal with it whatever it is . 

I have a lot of other things going on but to be this wiped and the abdominal pains are so bad it’s hard to pin point as i say i’ve got the hernia too (i’ve  got a surgical appointment in august for this ) 

i’ve got the pre assessment on the 28th and my social worker has asked the liasons to come with me as i don’t have people around really and I’m trying to think of things to ask .

I read about the colonoscopy and I know the dreaded prep , i had a lot smaller volume in march and that was bad enough.

i have a note pad in my phone so if anyone can think of things for me to ask i’d be greatful

this isn’t me being a chicken but i’m aware they do sedation but i’m always a survivor domestic  abuse  and so  I want to know wether i would have grounds to ask them to do a general anaesthetic . I have ptsd very badly and this stand for the abuse and then my critical health last year when i nearly didn’t make it . how would I ask this as i don’t want to fall appart in front of them 

they have booked both camera for the 13th july 

it’s just hanging over me and i keep saying to myself like last year it’s your anxiety causing all this symptoms but i know it isn’t and i’ve got a support group for bowels and bladder and some get told it’s either hemmoriods or ibs and years later are told it wasn’t so i’m scared of that too .

my head is like a blur and i’m scared and i have other stuff with life like a move to a ground floor flat in end of july and i have had poor mental health since my teens but currently scoring with severe anxiety and depression ( this was before i had these results ) 

i’m 38 years old female

im sorry it’s so long but i don’t know where else to put this or if there’s a helpline for people who are in a 2 ww

ty