Hello and thank you for your post,

I am sorry to learn of your mom's situation this must be a difficult time.

It is hard to see your loved one go through something like this and it is very different when compared with other people's relatives in a work capacity, so I am not surprised you find it hard. Often in this situation, friends and relatives can feel helpless.

I imagine it is distressing to see your mum like this, it could be the effects of medication or the cancer itself that is causing her low mood and to be paranoid. Either way, if you feel there have been changes in Mom these last few days, it would be good to get her reviewed as these may be a sign that she is deteriorating.

I don't know what support your mom has, but if palliative care or district nurses are involved in her care it might be worth chatting with them.  They should be able to support you, as well as help your mom and maybe clarify for you what stage she is at.

There isn't a clear right or wrong way to deal with this, but just being there for her will be a big support, even though it may not feel like it. I don't know if this helps, but we do have information on talking about dying and how to support someone as well as looking after ourselves.

I hope that you have good support for yourself at this time. If you find it helpful to talk things through with one of the nurses on our helpline the number to call is Freephone 0808 800 4040. The lines are open from 9 am till 5 pm, Monday to Friday.

Take care, 

Jemma