Advice for dad with terminal cancer

Hello,

My dad has kidney cancer which spread to the brain, so we know it is terminal in the sense that there is no cure. He has palliative care nurses in place, and he is still at home with my mum. However, over the past week he has become even weaker, is barely eating/drinking, has no energy, not even enough to wash his hands when he does eventually make it to the bathroom, he's barely talking and is sleeping all the time, just waking up to move if he's not comfortable or to go to the toilet. He is very disorientated and confused too. I just wanted some advice as I'm struggling to understand what should be done. My mum speaks with the nurses/Dr but not that regularly, and I feel like at this stage given he's not eating should he be in hospital to be monitored/put on a drip or something? Any advice appreciated. 

  • Hello krg83 and thanks for posting

    I am sorry to hear about your dad and appreciate you having some questions.

    Firstly I think it is important the doctor and nurses involved in his care are made aware of the changes to his health. Encourage your mum to call the GP or palliative care team so they can arrange someone to come out and assess him.

    Whilst this deterioration could be a sign he is approaching the end of life there could be other causes that need ruling out. The doctor will be able to assess your dads symptoms and decide a plan of what needs to happen next.

    If the doctor thinks it is best he is admitted to a hospital or possibly a hospice they can arrange this. However if they think your dad is best managed at home and that is your dad's wishes too they can request for more community nursing care equipment if needed and other support services. At the same time this will hopefully support your mum in keeping your dad as comfortable as possible.

    Please get back to us if you need any more information or support.  You may find it helpful to talk things through with one of the nurses on our helpline.  The number to call is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open from 9am till 5pm Monday to Friday.

    Best wishes,

    Naomi