Hello and thanks for your post,

I can understand that receiving a cancer diagnosis can be a very hard thing to process. There is so much to take in and deal with so I really sympathise with your friend.

It is difficult to be able to predict how long someone has got based on their cancer diagnosis. This is because every person is slightly different.

We do have survival statistics on our website but I know that we don't mention prostate spreading to the bowel but it will still be classed as a stage 4 as it has travelled to another part of the body outside the pelvis. Have a look here

These statistics are very general and are probably based on patients having treatment. 

Hopefully as time goes on your friend may decide to have treatment. It is important that he is presented with all the facts and information before he makes any decisions.

As you rightly say it is his decision to make, but he may be encouraged to start treatment to see how he gets on with it once he has processed it all.

I am not sure where he is living in the UK but up and down the country there are Maggie Centres that offer support in many different ways. Most of them have clinical psychologists. It can sometimes help to talk through his recent diagnosis and get help to process it all. Have a look at their website here

Macmillan offer 4 free counselling sessions linked with Bupa and your friend may find these helpful. Have a look here

Your friend may have a specialist nurse at the hospital who can talk through his different options including what support and follow up he will get if he decides not to have treatment. Try and encourage your friend to keep an open mind and listen to what the doctors have to say before he makes any decisions.

He may also find it helpful to chat to his GP about any decisions that he makes. if he decides not to have treatment it is his GP that will be supporting him in the community.

It can be hard as a friend supporting a close friend with cancer so do make sure that you look after yourself. We do have some tips on how you can help support someone here

If you or your friend would like to talk any of this through with one of the nurses on the helpline then you are welcome to give us a ring. Our number is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and we are here Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm.

all the best,

Catherine