Hello, I’m Jess and I’m 20 soon to be turning 21. I’m very much the biggest hypochondriac on this earth with major health anxiety. I never really did things that would ever put me at greater risk of nything until recently. I feel so stupid and keep crying every night and my panic attacks have become so extreme due to this. All my life my parents have LATHERED me head to do in factor 50‘a and 30 on holiday or hot days and before schools in the uk. I’ve never really been in the sun without suncream on much my life and I’m naturally rather pale. I always used fake tan and stuck by it despite he temptation of everyone around me having gorgeous but DANGEROUS real tans. I however got to May this year and failed. I caved and did a few 6 minute sunbeds (around 5) and didn’t tan at all. I the did a 10 minute and burnt really bad and never touched them after that as the burn was painful and peeling.  I then switched back to fake tan and again went turkey and again factor 50 always. However the past month and month only I’ve been doing sunbeds for 4-5 days ish a week for 9 or 12 minutes and started to tan and felt addicted but I’m so paranoid (this was so stupid and if I could take it all back I would) again only for just a month. I started analysing everything on my skin and have gone so insane I knew I had to stop. Both my grandparents got skin cancer mildly in their 70s but they spent their whole lives in Cyprus and abusing sunbeds and never wore suncream in Cyprus their whole lives. I’m aware even one sunbed is bad. I have an appointment on Friday for a doctor to check my skin so I can calm down but I’m never touching sunbeds again and defo going to wear factor 50 and avoid most sun for the rest of my live. I’m petrified it’ll bite me in the *** one day. I’m reading so much into melanoma and how common it is and how quick it spread. I check my body now regularly so I’d spot something I’m just so scared. I want a long healthy life. Can ANYONE PLEASEEE give me some tips or advice on how to calm down and manage this anxiety and rationalise it please I’m so heartbroken and distressed. It sounds stupid but I’m very bad with this stuff. Thanks