Hi Poppy20 and thanks for posting.

It does sound like it has been a very difficult time for your family.

You mentioned speaking to your mum's GP about what is happening.  It could be useful to get in touch with them, so they are aware of the situation, can make an assessment and hopefully offer some support. 

Anyone can raise a concern with the GP, but the GP can only discuss your mum's case with prior permission from her.

There is also a service run by Dementia UK,  who are called Admiral Nurses.  They can offer support and advice to people and families who are worried about dementia.  You can find out more about their helpline here. 

I wasn't sure from your post whether your mum was getting support from the palliative care team, sometimes called the Macmillan or hospice nurses.  This team is normally contacted by the GP, and sometimes the specialist nurse who may have been supporting your mum while she has been having treatment. Palliative care offers physical, emotional and practical support to people with a terminal illness and their families. It can be offered at any point after treatment aimed at curing a disease has stopped. 

The palliative care team will visit your mum at home and they will be able to give you all information about what happens next.  The team is made up of nurses and doctors.  They will be able to help with any symptom control, including medication that can help with things like pain.  They can also organise any equipment that may be needed, such as shower rails, walking frames, providing a bed to go downstairs, or anything else which may be helpful.  

This team is often an excellent contact and the people who are your main link to the rest of the community and hospital team. Talking to them can provide more information and give your family an idea of the local support available. 

It is important to get help and support for yourself too.  Talk to your GP about whether there are any counselling or support services available to you locally, the palliative care team might also be able to suggest sources of support for you.

There is a link here which can give you more information about the support that should be available to you, including practical support at home.

I have provided some links from our website below which you may like to read.  There is quite a lot to take it at the moment, but you may like to come back to these pages later, when you have a few minutes.

There is some information here about coping with cancer which might be helpful here.

We also have some ideas about taking care of yourself during these times here.

Please get back to us if you need any more information or support.  You may find it helpful to talk things through with one of the nurses on our helpline.  The number to call is Freephone 0808 800 4040 and the lines are open from 9am till 5pm Monday to Friday.

Yours sincerely,

Rachel