The second smear test at 29 came back as borderline abnormal cells with high risk HPV. My first in 2019 came back totally clean. I am being sent for a colposcopy, still awaiting the date. Non-smoker, no cancer in the family, pretty healthy but I may have a low immune system from sleepless nights and a stressful job (which I have worked to rectify since the news)
I am terrified this will be my life now, having my body slowly sliced apart through my 30s until a hysterectomy. I live a busy life, I travel, I work out, I dance, and if that gets taken away for months of surgery, tests and bleeding it probably isn't worth living.
-What are the chances it's more than borderline?
-What is the chances that I get sent away only for it to still be there the next smear test?
-Will I spend my whole 30s in and out of doctors, unable to live my life to its fullest?
-What are the chances of needing lletz and will that cause infertility?
Am I just counting down to getting a hysterectomy in the next decade? I know I don't have cancer now, I know abnormal doesn't mean cancer. But it feels like this is the start of a long road to getting cancer.
I don't want to live a life slowly getting my cervix lasered away until I have a hysterectomy, wasting my whole 30s with my legs in stirrups.
