Hi ...

Because the cancer is in his brain... he will act oddly .. like my sister with the dementure .. her personality changed .. and she had that for years befor it took her .. same questions over and over .. sometimes angry and fustrated .. but it wasn't her, it was the dementure .. so we just went into her world ... we knew how crule things are when they effect the brain .. your brother is the same .. it's not him, it's this crule cancer, that's invaded his body .. and he must be confused and upset and in pain ...

Can you put your self in his place for a while .. trust me, I have cancer too .. and I see and feel the pain that comes with it .. luckily it's not in my brain yet .. but that's the hardest to cope with .. so every time you chat weather it's just a few seconds or minutes .. he must be thinking of you to phone ... how amazing is that .. I'm so sorry you can't see this from his point of view .. from what you said he won't be here long so you won't have to have those calls for too much longer...

But please understand we are all fighting this desese on here .. and so many going through chemo .. my 18 year old granddaughter is battling acute myeloid leukaemia... and has lost her hair, getting so many side effects ... and still smiles through it .. and I've got 3 other family going through cancer too .. we are on here to hold each other up .. all of us, would and do support our loved ones ... and even in these crule times reach out to help each other .. so p,ease forgive me, thinking you've got it a lot easier ..

Maybe talk to your family and see if they can help you ...  our hearts goes out to your brother ... May he find piece ...

I'm really sorry about your brother Tony and I completely understand how difficult this situation must be for you.

If you're worried and would like to talk things through with one of our cancer nurses they are available on 0808 800 4040, Monday - Friday between 9a.m - 5p.m so do give them a call as they will do all they can to support you at this time.

Kind regards,

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hello Tony. I am sorry to read of your brother's cancer and the problems it brings for you.I am glad to hear he is in a care home and being well looked after. Are his carers aware of these continuous phone calls.? Maybe you could have a word with them. 

Kind regards.

Lynne.

The calls I am accepting without concerning the care home, I'm sure that his not thinking right due to the cancer in the brain, and I just go along with it. The conversations are nothing really, but maybe it's me who connects him ot the outside world, and I am trying to be as positive as I can, but I will be a mess when I see him Saturday, I just know it. Thank you. 

Tony