Hi ProfBaw   

I last replied on my mobile hense the  jumbled words...,

my nerves are shot to hell 

thank you for.being so supportive, you are being very kind being on here to chat to people who are in a kind of purgatory... 

I have tried so much to stay away from google but can't help myself at times ... 

I am now feeling pain in my shoulder joint tonight and I am not imagining it it is hurting me 

is this because of the lymph nodes could you ask your wife?

still very grateful for all your support... thank you so much 

The two weeks prior to her breast clinic appointment, she had back pain. as in sciatica down her legs, and a sore neck. She had also had a really *** cough for a few months that i was always nagging her to go see about. But she was always too busy with work. She was awful for seeing her GP as it was work, work, work.

One day in the shower, she got a shooting pain in her breast. That's when she found the lump. She slept on it for the night, then went to the gp the next day. She left it until the next day as she just wanted to see if it went down over night. Plus she had just had her period.

Anyway, we were kinda dreading the full body scans as she had that cough, the sore neck and that bad back. Everything had to be related. She was also beginning to get a sore breast more regularly during that 2 week wait. I was quietly convinced it was in her lungs. It's all i could think about. I never told her that prior to getting the results. But i barely slept for those 2 weeks.

The scans came back and her sore back was just that, a sore back as was her neck. The cough was allergies. The breast pain was the tumour pressing on a nerve. You have nerves running through your breast. Cancer itself tends to be painless. Pain happens when something is pressing against a nerve or there's a blockage. That's when most people realise something is up in the absence of feeling a lump.

My point being, you can have different issues going on at the same time. Being stressed tenses you, and in turn can cause your muscles to become tense thus more prone to injury or pain in general.

I'm not gonna sit here and tell you not to over think every niggle, because you will. We all do it. Hell, the day my wife got diagnosed, i had a sore armpit. I was paranoid. Then i realised it wasn't even me with the BC. It's how we as humans process things in our minds when stressed. We also over analyse everything doctors and nurses do. That nurse looked at as weirdly. she looked sad when looking at us. They're not meeting our eye. It must be bad. Even a single word in a letter we can twist into something it isn't. That's exactly how we were on the day we were receiving the scan results. We both had her dead and buried in that waiting room. Walked into the room and the first words that left his mouth were "good news ...".

But just remember, that shoulder issue can be something separate, just as my wife's back pain, cough and neck pain was something else entirely. You currently have a heightened sense when it comes to your body for understandable reasons, so keep that in mind.

You are incredibly kind and supportive of a very neurotic person.. I know I need to wait until my  scan to see if it has spread , woke up with agonising back pain today but trying to understand this coukd be stress not  one cancer... 

I have not been on google today 

You're not being neurotic at all. You're just stressed to the hilt and worried. Patients, partners and families of those going through this or have been through this more than understand the fear you're facing. No one will judge you at all. You wouldn't be human if you were acting like everything was rosy. We worry.

That's a perfect example of why Google is useless, and serves no purpose than to add more unnecessary worry upon an already stressful situation. If you search breast cancer and back pain, you'll be met by a wall of "OMG, it's spread". The way Goolge is set up, it can't and won't ever tell you that you have breast cancer and a pinched nerve in your back. Two potentially unrelated issues.  It doesn't work like that. It bundles all symptoms together.  That's exactly what people are driving at when they tell you not to go searching as you will never find the answers you are truly seeking. You will only ever find stuff that gives you bad news. It can't and will never differentiate between 2 sets of symptoms.

Again thank you for your kind words of support . I am a bit scared to look up immune boosting foods to help get me Randy for my chemo and during it. Any advice please? 

If you're wanting a laugh, re read your post. :laugh:

My wife wasn't given anything specific dietary wise. She just ate normally. She was just told if she found herself doing less exercise, to kinda curb eating high fat foods. That was literally the only thing she was told.

Though she did try to add more veg and that helped her somewhat. She was told to stay away from probiotics and to kinda stick to a pregnancy type diet. Meaning, to keep away from foods that could potentially make her unwell. Shellfish, shop bought sandwiches, Mayo etc.

Lol oh.gosh really should proff read my posts before I press post.... do this all the time... will I never learn... 

You sound Irish by the way you chat, my grandad was from Kilkenny and my friend lives in Sligo if you are 

Oh dear I really like prawns calamari and mayo... Also  love vegetables 

I'm Scottish.

Ask your team what you can and shouldn't eat. I don't think there are any hard and fast rules. So different nurses and docs will have different suggestions. It was the chemo booklet that stated to avoid raw ingredients (eggs, lettuce, shellfish etc), not the actual Onco. They just told her to try to avoid overly fatty foods in case she piled the weight on. As some people gain some weight with the steroids and because some people become less active whilst on chemo. My wife did, but lost it pretty quickly once all that treatment stopped.

Yeah, never change that typo because it was hilarious. Still laughing about it.