Goodmorning Brian

Certainly lots of wood used in the historical properties in Cantebury and full of character.  Sadly though as in so many towns these days many lay idle. Had never visited there for pleasure before.  The only time (reminded once I returned by old friend of my hubby) I was there before had been after a car racing incident when hubby had to have broken toe attended to at Canterbury hospital!

Hope when your son and grand-daughter finished their archery competitions there was good news and that they enjoyed it too.

As a family we have now received several letters of apology over the administrative errors during hubby's death registration.  Lessons appeared to have been learned as new training outlines/procedures at both the GP surgery and Registrars' Dept have been introduced and I really hope it will save any other family going through the emotional trauma it caused.  Everything seems to take such a time to finalise but we are now at leasing moving forward a bit more. Awaiting to hear from the crematorium as to when we can inter hubby beneath his parents' memorial rose and this will give us all another area of closure.

Spent yesterday afternoon in the garden (with a fewbreaks to rest the back!) and so it is mowed again and one side of borders has been weeded.  Our neighbours on one side do not weed and with a 'open wire' fence its an ongoing battle to keep their brambles from encroaching (especially important as the grandchildren enjoying 'digging' in the 'bare soil' I leave for them). Next job, when rest is weeded, will be to get the garden furniture 'spring cleaned' - ever hopeful of the warmer weather ahead (not too soon by looks of the forecast!).  Only two weeks to Easter and our break away to Dorset so it would be nice if the temperature could lift a bit though I am sure we will find plenty to do inside if needs be. Your forsythia bush looked lovely and such a shame that it became diseased.  Mine is also in a corner, by the garage, and I am training it across the rear wall - it provides a lovely splash of colour at this time of year and often  becomes the home of nesting birds so keeping my eyes open.  The goldfinches have returned and some days have up to 10 on the feeder (niger seed on demand). Mr and Mrs Blackbird are carrying moss/twigs into the honeysuckle so hopeful they are 'moving in' again.

Well, had best wash up before going to work. Kind regards to you and the family.  Jules xx 

GMorning Jules = welll, glad your garden is starting to look good after the winter. I also did the garden yesterday - raked lots of moss out of the lawn and started a new little border for cottage garden flowers. I fell to buying some plants from our pound shop = so can't wait to put them in!! Debating on veggie = maybe just some salads this year. All my sweetpea seeds have been dug up and eaten by the birds!! So, back to square one there.

Sorry to hear how officialdom made things stressful for you at a time of loss and grieving. How stupid they are - and isn't it about time they stopped 'learning' = and just got on with their role professionally? My heart goes out to you !!!

Steve

Well here goes.  For some reason my 'internet signal' keeps dropping out and have just lost last effort to post grrr.

As regards the professionals well to err is human so they say and hopefully despite the trouble/heartache it caused at the most difficult of times(failure to tick a box began the downward spiral!!) (emotionally draining for those involved), the help since has been second to none and hopefully the new 'double checking' procedures mean no other family faces what we went through.  Over two months on gaining some closure helps of course. Still take the view that forgiveness is easier than dwelling on what occurred and no doubt hubby would have found it right that it 'made him late' as he was  not a good timekeeper.

Am shortly going out and have my grandchildren for tea on Thursday with the younger one sleeping over to give my daughter and son in law a break overnight (he has been having bad nights for a few weeks now due to teething and they are pretty shattered) so need to stock up with kiddie food.

Hope you and Anne are keeping well. Jules

Hi all

Having visited Mum this morning (she was reasonably bright and had her hair permed) returned home and have had an emotionally wobby afternoon.  Have made the arangements for the formal scattering of hubby's ashes in the woodland garden of remembrance and have chosen his birthday 2 April  as this seemed a good day for me and the children/grandchildren to be together (was going to be emotional in any event). Another step in my journey.

Peaceful thoughts to you all. Jules xx

Good afternoon Jules,

Glad you have recieved letters of apology and so they should for the extra stress they caused you at a most stressful time. Can well understand your feeling teary at the moment. You have coped amazing throughout and shoild feel proud of the way you have dealt with things and yet have still found time to help others on here as well.

GP and family are not impressed with the hospital regarding putting the old feeding button back. They must have struggled with it for when a new one is fitted, apparently the inner part expands when it gets wet. My grandson has been bleeding fron this infection and daughter in law says that allthough she knows from his reaction when cleaning or attacing feeding tube it must be painful, he has not moaned about it.

Took Mrs B to a garden centre today and I bought an oval picture frame made out of plaster. I will use this as a template for my wooden ones as I am no good at drawing ovals or any shape come to that. Hope your visit to your mother went well today. Take care Jules, best wishes to you and your family, Brian. 

Hello Jules,  Apologies for not being in touch for a while, I haven't been on the forum for a while.  My life seems to be busy which I guess is good.  I do hope you are OK and that you are still receiving lots of support from your lovely family and of course your forum buddies.  I hope the scattering of hubby's ashes goes as well as it can - it will no doubt be a very emotional time for you.  By coincidence I also chose my Dad's birthday as the day for his ashes, it seemed to be the right way and hope it will be for you too.  Take care my friend.  Hope x

Hi).Hope

Think its great that you are now able to move on and keep busy (your memories follow you wherever you are).  As you can imagine up and down days and very much an emotional wobble after making the arrangements for hubby's final resting place. Very lucky to have good work buddies who gave me a hug when I went to work today (think my eyes gave me away!!). Still drawing support from my special friends and virtual buddies.  Me and the children draw strength from each other and the little ones continue to  lift our spirits with their smiles (youngest one is currently 'teething for England' and so I am having him for a couple of nights so poor Mum, Dad and elder brother can catch up on some much needed sleep).  I have a five day break to Dorset soon (with daughter and family) and hope a period of total relaxation/family time will help us all to move forward again.  As you say having  his birthday for the little ceremony will be another emotional time but the day would have been difficult whatever we were doing - so many 'firsts' to get through but I am grateful for all the help and 42yrs of memories.

Hope your family are all keeping well and I suppose it will not be long before your younger boy will be taking exams and then hopefully off to Uni.  Where does the time go?  Look after yourself and sending hugs.Jules xx

Hi Brian

Your cheeky grandson should get a medal for all he has been through and still. despite recurrent problem. could teach us adults a thing or two on how to face up to adversity. Just reading about him makes me feel humble.  I really do hope they can  put things right for him (it would leave me spitting bricks!!) as he deserves the very best.

Any luck with your microphone recognition on the PC.  Its always the way when  you want to use something it lets you down (big grrr on your behalf).

Very understanding at work today (think my eyes gave me away as to how delicate I was feeling); hugs from staff on arrival and chat with my Manager helped no end and I got on with my very busy shift though  felt a bit 'heady' by time I came home.  Tomorrow  I have the grandchildrens' visit to enjoy, then sleepover with little Zack (hoping my daughter/husband and elder grandson can catch with a decent night' sleep).  Daughter has her appointment through for the heart hospital for around three weeks time. Handily its a Friday so I can go and 'sit' for her.  Eldest wil go to school and  I will stay at the flat until  she gets back (has been worned to allow 4hrs for check up/possible testing) to take care of Zack.  Its times like this when I am pleased I am part time and able to offer helping hand.

Mum was not to bad at my visit yesterday and had had her hair permed so looked quite bright (though always says she is no good bless her).  She has been having eye drops as they would not stop watering and these seem to have helped.  The manager of the home retires on the 1st May after over 25 years dedicated service and have been invited to her 'surprise do' - fingers crossed I will be able to make it as I have so much to thank her for during the 2+ years that Mum has been resident.

Hope the 'plastercast' oval frame helps with your woodturning - easier to have a template to base things on I am sure.  All the very best to you and Mrs B ~(she must love all the owls you are making but it might be hard for you to 'move them out' for your forthcoming shows). Take care  Jules x

Good Morning Jules,

Good news, my grandson was feeling better last night when I went to see him. As I got indoors he said, "Oh, it's you Brian, come and sit next to me for I'm waiting for my story". He told his dad off for calling me Brian. He said, "Thats your father and you should call him Dad". When he replied, "Yes and you should call him Granddad",  he just srugged his shoulders and said "Oh well". He told his dad, that he is the only one who can call me Brian. Cheecky little monkey.

It not good news about the brother in law I'm afraid. He saw the oncologist yesterdat and was told his PSA had gone up and the chemo hadnt worked. The cancer has spread and the last few days his back has been quite painful. They are going to put him on a new treatment which is very expensive. I suspect it may be arbiterone. He coped well with the news but poor sister in law was understanably very upset. Just make me feel so lucky and grateful to Mrs B for making me go to my GP and for the result I had with my prostate cancer.

Talking of Mrs B, when we went to our local chemist, I bought her an owl key ring. When you press a button on the back of the owl, it gives out a hooting sound and it's eyes light up. You should have seen her face. Just had to buy it for her. Makes a nice little torch as the light is quite bright. Also bought her a jam pot shaped like an owl. She tells me it's too good to use for this and it will end up spending it's life as an ornament. Spent another frustrating 4 hrs yesterday trying to get my headset microphone to work all to no avail. I just hate being beaten. It's probabaly something silly and I will end up kicking myself for not figuring it out sooner.

Its great you have a good support team at work as this must help a whole lot to have understanding people to work with. Lets hope the person who replaces the one in charge at your mothers care hime is as good as the last one, for this gives you peace of mind knowing she is well looked after. Hearing so many stories about lack of care and worse at care homes lateley in the news make me very angry.

Hope you get to go for your usual night out on Friday. Wishing you and your family a peaceful and stressfree weekend, Brian.

Hi Brian

So good to read that your cheeky grandson is improving and hope this continues. Will he have to go back for the new feeder button at some point?

How sad that your brother in law has not been so successful with his treatment and that his cancer has spread further . Do hope the new treatment plan can help and maybe different pain meds can give him some relief.  My heart goes out to him and his wife and I am sure Mrs B is upset and concerned in equal measure though I know she has your wonderful support. 

Sounds like  you will need to buy Mrs B her own 'shed' to display all the owls you are finding for her. It is lovely that the bits and pieces you find for her are well loved (even if not used for the purpose they were made for.)  I have re-adopted Cobweb in hubby's memory this year and have the new photo and certificate framed in the lounge.

Zack was fine overnight (only waking once before I went to bed) and strangely I slept well too!!  My daughter came round after the school/libary run and stayed for a little while before heading back home.  They were so grateful to get a night's sleep too.  He is back with me overnight Saturday and its nice to be in a position to help occasionally. The eldest starts school holidays from 2.30 today and we have our 5 day break week after next. I think it will be good for us all to get away for some 'fun' days though we do have an emotional Thursday beforehand. Still to be expected and its best to cope day to day and go with the emotions - still early days.

Am off out this evening though we are both taking the bus as my friend had a car come out of a side turning and hit hers, which has resulted in broken headlight so cannot drive at night until fixed.  Luckily no one hurt though I am sure she and her husband (both mid 70's) were a little shook up. Last thing they need is added stress at the moment as they are in the process of moving house.  Will see if there is any way  can help when I see her tonight.  Well hope you and MrsB have a good weekend.  Back to the household chores. chat again soon.  Regards Julesx