Hi all,

I posted over 7 years ago when I was first diagnosed with bowel cancer.  I have since had the tumour removed, followed by radiotherapy and chemo which had to be abandoned and then papillon treatment and all seems to be well.  It is probably more than 4 years since I last saw anyone and had my last of very many colonoscopys.  

However, last week I received a note from the hospital regarding my (almost non-existant) follow-ups to have a blood test which they said was 'within normal limits' and today, out of the blue I received a phone call giving me a hospital appointment for a colonoscopy!

It has been such a very long time - almost 8 years since diagnosis and more than 7 since I finished treatment.  I made note of the date and time and have been feeling terrible all day.   I told my husband and then burst into tears.  

I don't know what to do as I just feel that I don't want to start all that again - all the hospital visits and treatments etc.

I am almost 70 and wonder if it is really worth it! - Do I really want to know if I have a problem or would I be better not knowing.  I am very confused and don't know whether I should just say that I don't want to have this done, which of course would make things difficult if I did need further treatment, or to grit my teeth and have it done?  I am sure there are many people out there who would want, or need to have this appointment rather than me.

What happens if they find something?  The next course of treatment, if required, would have to be a bowel removal and stoma.  I am not sure that I could deal with that now after all this time and I do have other health problems which make such a large operation very difficult.

I know that only I can make the decision but if anyone feels able to give an opinion or any kind of advice which might help me decide, I would be most grateful.

Sorry for the long rambling post but my mind is 'whirring about' at present.

Many thanks for any help,

Grannie D