Hi everyone

I've tried to be positive when posting previously, but I'm having a bit of a wobble at the moment!

Next week on the 23rd January I will be having my 18th and final Avastin treatment which has been controlling stage 4 ovarian cancer. My consultant is pleased that things are stable for now and I don't see him until 5th March after my next CT scan.

Everyone keeps saying how good it is to have a break from treatment, but to be honest I'm terrified! Having no treatment scares me, as in my head, the cancer is still there and nothing is being done. My family and friends have been fantastic but they don't understand how I feel.

I know I'll be back on chemo at some point and should probably make the most of the break in treatment, but I can't help the way I feel. 

Anyway, I really should focus on the positives, but sometimes this whole cancer thing gets to me.

Jan