Please don't infer any criticism. I realise that most people have a different point of view from me but rather than thinking you wrong, I was trying to put my perspective on things. Just because people might disagree on the odd point, doesn't make one or the other wrong, just different.
There's a couple of main reasons why I think and post as I do -
Firstly, I've been on duloxetine for chronic pain for years. As this is an anti-depressant it obviously affects me mentally. I'm simply unable to hold a negative thought for more than a few seconds. Which also makes me realise that previously, I must have had mild depression.
Having said that, I am not emotionless; some of the posts on here actually move me to tears but again, that feeling does not carry on for more than a few seconds. My medication also randomly produces seconds of crying, for no reason, here and there.
Secondly, depending on your point of view, I'm blessed/cursed with a terrible memory, both long and short term. And I'm talking terrible. As well as forgetting words I forget names and faces, conversations . . . virtually everything, in fact.
Thus, I'm always in the moment. I cannot worry about things or ponder in any way, positive or negative. I respond to a sentence or phrase in a post, writing from the perspective of the moment.
I understand people saying stay strong but it means very little to me. Things occur, are dealt with and we move on.
An example - I have two colostomy bags (one's officially a fistula) and from time to time they leak. The first time it happened, I noticed as I woke up. Not a huge leak but both I and the bed were in a bit of a mess. There was an immediate urge to apologise, as if I'd done something wrong. It's a very stressful moment, knowing there's been an accident and that you smell and will continue to do so in full view of all and sundry until clean up is complete.
What actually happened was that my wife calmly said, 'You go and sort yourself out and I'll see to the bed' - stressful situation averted - what could have seen a meltdown by some was not even a drama.
My wife cares for me, sometimes to the extent of having to help me wash or shower. As soon as I'm hungry, she'll make food for me. It might be considered by most that she's being strong, yet if she thinks I'm ill she almost has a breadvan.
And yet, I'd describe her as a tower of strength despite not quite getting what 'being strong' is. And it seems to mean slightly different things to different people.
So Babz and indeed everybody, my contrary posting style is in no way a criticism of anybody, just seeing things from the moment's perspective.
