Hi, this is also my first time on here. I lost my mam in March of this year (2018). She was diagnosed of having lung cancer late 2017 although a biopsy came back as inconclusive. Pet scans showed a mass in her lung. Because of the inconclusive biopsy she was given steroids and antibiotics and was given another pet scan 4 weeks later. The mass has grown but only by a millimetre. She was operated on in the beginning of March and her torso was cut in half. She was released from hospital  after only 5 days, we were told the minimum stay would be 10 days. She took poorly a week later and was sent to a different local hospital for an x ray. She was sent home with anaemia. Two days later she was rushed into yet a different hospital where she ended up in intensive care with pneumonia present in both lungs. She died three days later. It wasn’t until we were given the go ahead 5 days later to register her death that we learnt she died not from cancer but a lung abscess. I am so angry and so confused, everything was wrong, everything, I just can’t get my head around it. Broken.

Lung cancer 

My father was diagnosed with lung cancer in February 2019. And it was so unexpected as my father has other medical health issues which I had to in the end give up my job as a occupational therapist.

I am his carer and since he was diagnosed with dementia back in 2012 it hasn't been easy. He has long and short term memory and he can be quite deluded at times. Declining when he's at his worst, personal and general hygiene, meal time, dislikes of food choices etc. 

Cancer was further away from my mind, I noticed back in 2018 that he was losing weight and that he had a slight cough, especially when I took him on holiday in September last year.

I assume that his dementia was getting worst and asked his gp to refer him for cognitive memory Assessment. The referral was taking ages, so I kept on several occasions going back and forward to his gp for the same referral appointment. My father was wasting away in front of eyes, until I decided to go back to his gp requesting for a chest xray and more blood test. 

To my surprise my father's blood test came back with raised calcium with inflammation of the body. I then knew something serious was wrong with my father. That said day I drove to the hospital to get his xray done, what to come next I didn't expect the big dreaded C. (Lung Cancer). My father had several test, ct, pet scan, BIOPSY TESTS. For he's raised calcium the oncology booked an immediate appointment the next day for a blood fusion.  My father had his radiotherapy in April and May as he wasn't a good candidate for chemotherapy because of all his other medical conditions.

We are now in the month of June, he's lost more weight, he had major problems with swallowing, chest and neck pain and digesting his food, we had to liquidise his food, he was in so much pain. He's on pain control medication, which has helped as I couldn't  bear him groaning in pain anymore. He is on morphine and other pain relief medications. He's still losing weight he's now 9 and a half stone from being 14st.

Now he doesn't sleep at nights, from sleeping too much he appearing very tired. He just sitting up at nights. I'm not sure if it's the cancer or something else, is this normal...this is so unreal. From only eating 3 to 4 spoonful hes now eating his breakfast off but not his dinner. I do not know what to make of this. As he's still losing weight. We've got a couple gp and hospital appointments within the next week. I'm also in contact with his Macmillan nurse and the palliative care specialist, but this is so hard to come to terms with.

Let me know your feedback on my experience. 

Shazie63

Dear Sandra

I'm so sorry to hear your story. I lost my extremely brave and wonderful mum at Easter.

my advise to you is to spend as much time as you can with your Mum. My mums oncologist was pretty accurate with his prognosis of short months. 

I nursed my mum at home as this was where she wanted to be and it was truly the hardest time I have ever had , but the fact that I stayed with her until the end brings me so much comfort.

I had lots of support from Marie Curie who were invaluable . If you feel like you could do with some support I would contact them.

Take care x

I am so sorry to hear about your mum.. I have been reading everyone's different difficult heartbreaking stories and I'm really confused about my mums situation. 
After spending 7 weeks in hospital being really poorly and not able to walk or coordinate very suddenly she was diagnosed with terminal SCLC on 17th October and given between 4/6 weeks left of life... we were and are absolutely devastated .. she was discharged from hospital nearly 2 weeks ago..as she wants to he at home..since then she is eating more.. seems to be getting stronger? I just don't understand it all? After what the doctors and nurses have said they don't expect her to live much longer than November but today .. for the here and now she is very much still so full of life?

Our Mother was the same after similar prognoises. She was diagnosed Oct 17 with SCLC, she has had Chemo, radiotherapy & pain management RT. She seemed to get more of an apiatete and be full of life, same as you have said & it was very confusing, sadly 8 week after that she is now getting weaker has just had fluid drained of her lung. Is in so much pain and is on high level pain relief. 
I keep thinking this is the day but then she keeps fighting. 
she's so tired but is scared to sleep so it's been long nights for her & us as a family. We are just trying to comfort her as best we can and spend as much time as possible with her! I'm thankful I've been able to spend so much time with her as I've been her main carer. Much love to you, completely empathise as we are all or have all been effected by this devastated disease! My heart breaks daily for my Ma and for anyone suffering the same, love & empathy to all x

Thank you for replying, I'm so sorry to hear about your mum, it's just heartbreaking for everyone involved caring for a loved one who is battling this devastating disease. My mum is still here and is doing quite well. She has a little discomfort in her lower back and ribs which for now she seems happy to take paracetamol, I find our situation quite remarkable and so far feel positive that we are spending our time together having our chats, some very difficult, some very funny! Her cancer specialist offered radiotherapy but she chose to decline because my mum decided she wanted some quality of life for however long she has left? I feel very blessed compared to other heartbreaking posts that I have read,that my mum is still here and doing relatively well. I still find it all very confusing and I'm very frightened of what is to come and when it will come? I am thankful for every day that I get to spend with my mum. Sincere love and sympathy to all who is dealing and battling.. for as long as you can..be happy..smile..laugh and be positive! Xx

I am sure I have lung cancer which may have spread to my liver. About 18 months ago I suffered back pain in upper right side which spread around the front under the rib and I developed a bubbly tummy and felt a bit breathless. I had normal blood tests an abdominal scan which revealed a small gallstone an endoscopy that revealed a hernia a ct scan colonoscopy and chest xray all normal. The pains subsided so I forgot about it and got on with life. 8 weeks ago the back pain and abdominal pain returned so I went back to gp who did bloods all normal. A couple of weeks ago the pains have become much worse including under my left rib and I've felt extremely fatigued so I've asked for another scan. Really scared of what this is all about and the worse scenario is going through my head.

Hi ..

im so sorry to have had replied for so long.. 

I do hope you have your answers and diagnosis to your plight?

I absolutely wish you well x

Hi there thank you for your concern. I saw a consultant in December who offered me keyhole surgery but not with covid around and not in the winter months  and with no guarantee it was the cause of the pain, I did have a second ultrasound and once again it just showed a gallstone. Everything settled down and with covid I havnt pursued it but I'm getting nice sweats (not soaking) and occasional pain and tiredness but the second set of blood tests were all fine. Not sure of next step! 

Hi Sandra so so sad about your mum 

my partner was diagnosed with ex SCLC april 2021 gave 4 cycles of chemotherapy then told had excellant response he was eating so well gained lots of weight then chemotherapy stopped started maintenance immunotherapy after second one had CT which showed progression of cancer consultant was thinking on 3rd line therapy of oral medication chemotherapy based but it was decided firstly it'd be of little help secondary he was very close to his end of life.I was told a matter of weeks as this type of cancer spreads rapidly once it starts to progress after responding to first line chemotherapy.so now it's palliative care alone .each day I wonder is this our last day together.all I can say I have him home carring for him solely as that's my choice if and when things get so awful then palliative care will come in a lot more it's cruelest illness he's not eating can't swallow well hates smells of anything iv also noticed confusion all I ask for now is he's pain free which he is and his passing is dignified and peaceful.

it's a journey nobody wants to take with someone they love so very much .how precious he is to me we talk openly now on the dying process iv expressed my love to him and he knows I'll be with him till his end on this life and one day together again in paradise I hope your brother begins to except this sad loss of his mum it's never easy loosing a parent my deepest sadness is with you all