We found out in June this year that my mum had cancer and I was in complete denial! My mum has had chemo and we thought it was positive! The doctor has said my mums chemo is incurable and she has less than a year to live! I had no reaction to this and suddenly a few nights ago I exploded! I wouldn't let go of my mum I was just clinging to her telling her to never leave me! I cannot live without my mum she is the person who holds me together and I'm not coping with all these new feelings. I've never been more scared. Anyone else been in the same situation.
i am in the same situation with my dad and not coping well at all i felt the same in denial i really cant stop crying and cant imagine life without him i have found it so very hard watching him suffer i feel like i am in a living nightmare
I come across this post & made me feel some comfort that im not alone! Im sorry to hear about your families & its heartbreaking! My mum was diagnosed with lung cancer a month ago & we were told last week it was incurable but chemo might help prolong it & shes start chemo next week. I just don't know what to do! Im so angry, upset & all other emotions. I dont know how im going to cope when she passes & it feels me with dread! I just dont/cant believe its happening! Im 25 with 2 young children & i just dont know how to cope. Shes our world, our everything. Does anyone know how chemo effects people? What to expect?
Any advice would be greatful. Ive never been through this & have no idea.
nicolajayne I feel your pain believe me. I am in the same situation with my mum. We knew it wasn;t cureable but we were told they would try and keep it stable... the chemo didn't work for my mum and we were told last Monday that she is now terminally unwell. I know exactly all the emotions you are going through because I feel them every single day. I honestly don't know where to turn or how to cope. I feel sick to the pit of my stomach every single minute and that is because I have such dread. She is coming home from hospital today and in a way I am dreading it because I know in my heart she is coming home to die. We don't know how long she has left but it is very frightening.
Try to contact the nearest Hospice to your home or the Macmillan service I have found that both services are very supportive and have valuable information.
I'm really sorry to hear all your stories and know exactly how you all feel.
My mum was diagnosed 12 months ago with extensive small cell lung cancer. It was the worst day of my life. I found out I was having my first child Just a week before that and was frightened to feel she may not be here.
The doctors said 6-12 month and she has done well but I'm beginning to fear the worst again. I'm back home helping as my dad is coping the best and it's hard raising a child and trying to be strong I'm at a loss of what to do now and how to cope anymore
It's Thursday today and on Tuesday my world came crashing down, my mother, my saviour,my best friend was diagnosed with pancriatic cancer, stage 4... My world fell apart for a moment..... Just unsure how much time is left before this cruel disease takes her away from me and my boys.....f##k you cancer you selfish a*****e...
I'm sorry jen, that you had to wake to this nightmare. I still remember how the diagnosis of my mom's cancer spilt my life in two - the life before and the life after. At first I couldn't believe that my mom got such a terrible diagnosis (it was colon cancer, stage IV), they said that without treatment she got 6-8 weeks. Everyday I woke up feeling that it's just a dream, that it can't be true, but after some time when the treatment (chemo, radiotherapy and few surgeries) started the realisation came that from now on this is our life, life full of cancer (no matter how you try to forget and have a good time it's still there, lurking), full of dread and then hope and after that hopellessness again after new test came back that cancer is not gone and they don't have anything else to try and the only thing left after 2 years of battling is just see your beloved mom die. I guess the most important part is that no matter how much time you have left try to say to your mom everything you ever wanted to say or listen maybe your mom has something to say to you and your boys. I won't shove any positivity *** at you, because it won't help, but wanted to say, that you can go through this (I repeat this to myself too) and the only thing that helps me for now is knowing that my mother would be devastated if she knew that her cancer ended her family's life too. Take care, honey (and your boys, they need their mom too).
Hi, my mom died of cancer when I was 14, it was horrible, I blamed myself! Wishing/thinking I could of been there more, done more but I'm ganna be honest the pain heals in time! I seen a difference hen I final expected what had happened, at first I was *** off and whenever someone said ya mum joke it would get to me! But you got to remember that they don't know! and just did the one thing I knew she would want me to do, move on! I'm sorry if I'm being blunt! I'm only saying what I would of like to here when you mother died, keep your chin up and remember she'll be looking over you!
hi, i know how you feel but in the situation with my Dad, hes in hospital atm and i only been told tonight that my dad is only going to last a few more nights or me might not live through tonight:/ hes seduted since he had his operation on moday, so hes not in any pain or anything. i just wish i could hear his voice one last time, but im not going to be able to, this cancer is too agressve.
All i can say is, just dont panic.. make some amazing memorys with your mum!! i promoise your feelings and emotions will be their but in time you will be able to cope with them better once youve had more time and ajusted to situation. im only 18 as well:(
Hi Dave, I just wanted to say how much your messaged gave me strength and encouragement. It's good to hear the parents perspective - my dad got diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer in February 16, he is 67, I'm finding ring iso hard to accept, I'm fine when im with him but at wreck when im not. But I took from your message about you not wanting your boys grieving for you why you are alive and kicking and that's what I need to do dad is still here. You are
a brave man, my dad is finding it really hard going to bed at night and he is so frightened it's so hard to know what to say.
