When do I accept defeat .i am scared to let go, but  I have to , I’m in pain now . I want to eat my body makes me hungry. Then I feel pain because I’ve eaten . How long can I go on like it , it’s a vicious circle . I remember when I lost my mum, they said that it could take longer because she was strong willed. So I think as I’m still very much still with it . I should make a Decision to go home ( the next life). Wish we could choose like in different country’s .this is not fair now , we put animals to sleep when it’s their time . We should also have to Choice .