How can life be so cruel. You find someone who is so kind, nice and understands you because they have been through similar things . But I’m dying what I kick in the teeth. Maybe we would of just been great friends but it’s not fair .
Hiya Clare. Just been to make myself a cup of tea. How are you? Have you slept okay? Have you eaten? I didn't sleep at all in the night.......pain. I feel so exhausted. As you know Clare, it is impossible to sleep when you are in pain. Clare I was reading a post where you mentioned that you have always tried to do right by folks and you end up getting hurt. That resonated with me so much! Lately I have been doing a LOT of reflecting on my life, and I have realised that there were too many times when I put the needs of other folks above my own needs. I suspect you are realising the same thing. My Mum once told me that there are 2 types of people in the world: The givers and the takers. I think that folks like us fall in to the first category. I can think of one particular example of a 'friend' that betrayed me in the most horrible way. For a long time I felt bitter and resentful towards this man, but then I had a light bulb moment: My bitterness and resentment wasn't hurting HIM..........it was hurting ME. So I decided to forgive him, right then and there. You know what Clare, it was such a relief to put that burden down. When I think of my friend now, I almost feel sorry for him, because I am the one that can look in the mirror without feeling ashamed of myself. I wonder if he can? You are the better person Clare. You showed love and kindness........YOUR soul is in tact. Anyway mate, enough of my waffling, stay strong, xx
Hello sorry to hear that you haven’t slept. I’ve not been to sleep yet . I think your mum was right about the two types of people. I read once that you could describe them as drains and radiators . I like you always put others before myself. Always let people talk to me out of term then got mad for not Sticking up for myself, . It’s is odd that with this horrible illness your mind and memories are so Sharp more than they have ever been so I find myself going over things from years ago . Like you said I’ve been thinking about school my first day. . Take care hope you get some sleep. Xx
