Hi there, thank you for your response and forgive me for being slow - I am so busy at the moment trying to manage young children, my job, keeping sane and of course being there for my husband!

What? Your husband has the same cancer? And how old are your children? How are you coping?

Will has had two lots of chemo: His first was cisplatin with etoposide, which he managed well and kept on working (school teacher). The chemo didn’t shrink anything but kept things stable. That finished in August and he started his new treatment of irinotecan 2 weeks ago. It’s been made clear to us though that after this drug, there’s nothing else. Between chemo treatments his cancer grew quickly and his pain became unmanageable so he started on morphine, which he continues to take. He cannot work now due to pain and tiredness and struggles to pick up the kids. It’s heartbreaking as I keep trying to figure out why this is happening. He is such a kind, gentle and loving man. 

Big hugs to you too. Keep in tough and I’ll always respond - even if it takes a while x

Theres more chrmo drugs for pancreatic cancer floxi something and gebapentin or sonething like that plus 2 others surely they can offer your hubby more 

Was lovely to get your message. You are doing amazingly well keeping everything together. It's hard. I haven't been at work since my husband's diagnosis. His tumour is v large and he is on a lot of medication for pain nausea etc. He has been off too since the week before he was diagnosed as he was unable to eat or sleep. Things improved now he is on medication.  He was fit and healthy until 6 weeks before his diagnosis. 

The kids are all at primary school and we are all receiving help to deal with the diagnosis from a charity. Are you getting any support?

Just started EP too. Going ok so far but won't know til after 3 cycles and a CT if it is making any difference. They plan to do 6 cycles. 

Sending you hugs and positive thoughts. Keep me updated. X 

hi, im so terribly sorry for your situation, this is really a cruel and tragic thing to happen to such a young family....the diagnosis of cancer is so terrible for us all and its very hard to cope emotionally as a patient or a caregiver, and the anxiety is often overwhelming, i can only suggest you take as much help from friends and family that you can, lean on other people who are there for you and realise you dont have to do this alone, try to spend as much quality time with your husband and children as you can, and hard as it is, try to stay strong for them, your children will need you so much and they can also be a great source of joy and support for you in the future, and your husband will always live on in them.....my heart goes out to you all, but you will be ok, please believe thatxxxx

Hi, as you know I am going thru this too and I do feel your pain. My two girls are 8 and 12 and this week I had to tell them the treatment hasn't worked and the Dr's say we only have a few weeks left with him, how do we survive this, I am a mess, stressed to the max and can't eat or sleep, he is 44 and now there is no chance he will make 45. How do we get ourselves,  our children and our darling husband's thru this without a breakdown. Can't see any light at the end of the tunnel now only dark, I have sent you a friend request so we can talk more together if u want to, I only feel understood by others suffering it too st the moment. Anyone else in similar situation please send friend request so we can support each other. We are hoping to bring him home from hospital today and then be under home care from the hospice, he is still on immense pain and can hardly walk, certainly can't do the things he loves like mountain biking with his daughter. One thing I have found is stop looking at Facebook.  it does u no good to see other people obliviously posting stuff about their frivolous lives when ours are ending,  sending hugs to anyone out there suffering too

Hi Liz, No one will NEVER imagine what you are going trough. Maybe none of my words will help you but after reading your post I had to register and say something to you. From what I have read you think you are not coping but actually you are stronger than you think.  When I was about to lose my loved one the only thing I could think was how she was feeling. All the time I was encouraging and reassuring her that she could rest in peace and we would all be ''fine'' ( me and my soon).  Since your husband may feel anxious about the idea of ​​leaving you and the children alone, it is important to put them in peace, informing them that all will be fine and that they can rest in peace. Sorry if my words are not helping but this was the best way i went torugh to it. All the Best to you Liz

Oh my goodness, what an ordeal you are all dealing with right now. I’ve accepted your friend request but not sure what to do now - do we just message privately? And what is your name?

im so sorry the treatment hasn’t worked. It’s utter *** isn’t it? How are your children reacting to the news? And how are you keeping strong in the face of such adversity? And how is your husband? Is he frightened, angry etc? You will get through this though - you and your girls will get through this. I promise. You are strong. I know how you feel completely. Some weeks I think I can handle it, in fact one of my biggest therapies is vigorous exercise. For those brief moments when I’m running or working out I feel invincible. It doesn’t last though of course and then I feel so truly overwhelmed, like I’m losing my mind. I worry the kids will get taken away from me and I’ll be hospitalised. But we have no choice. We have to do this for our husbands and kids. I fear for the kids the most - I want them to be as nurtured and protected despite all this as possible. 

Did you and your husband receive good care in the hospital? Are you and the girls getting support? I for one don’t think I get any emotional support, other than from friends. And are the hospice good? Will you try and keep him at home?

we had an awful week 2 weeks ago. Will had an infection so had to stay in hospital, came home utterly depressed as he hates hospitals, saw his oncologist looking for some hope regarding alternative treatments- we were even willing to go abroad if Will was well enough, but it appears there’s nothing and reading between the lines we should focus on spending more quality time as a family. We then went to visit a natural burial site. I completely lost it at that point and then later that day my husband was in floods of tears - he is so frightened. The kids don’t know much yet other than that Will has medicine, has a poorly back and sees the doctor regularly. It breaks my heart that Elliott, at 14 months old, won’t even remember him. 

Mon Tuesday this week we have his latest scan results. Yay!! Another likely “I’m so sorry” meeting. 

You take care of everyone (especially yourself) as best you can. Think positive strong thoughts. I know this doesn’t always work but try to replace “I can’t do this” with “I can do this” or “I am willing”. 

Love to you all xxx

Hi, I have sent you a private message, hope you find it ok!  If not I can tell you how to access it!  Tom is home now and under hospice care, they are just doing pain relief now.... depressing

So sorry to hear I have pancreatic neuroendocrine tumor  but at the moment just grade 1  slow growing but could change  but also have another cancer mutiple myeloma no cure come back 3rd time can only keep it at bay for so long 

But my thoughts to you and your good sir and family xxxx

Hey Liz, how are you and your family. I'm sorry if this comes at a bad time. I've just read your story from a while back. I just wanted to reach out. Lots of love to you