Reading all the posts and it's all so sad. It's good to see other people feel similar. I, like you all, find I'd rather just be on my own rather than be with people talking nonsense. No one can ever really say the right thing, and I also feel I'm a different person now. Even more less time for bs. It's constantly with me that mum isn't here, and that life will never be the same. It is the start of a completely different life. 

I lost mum last July, she was 60 and also had lung cancer, like your mum Chloe. By the time mum had any symptoms, the cancer had spread to her brain, liver and lymph nodes, she only lasted 6/7 weeks with it.  So heartbreaking, as she was so full of life in April/May. She only had a headache and had a bit of a limp in her leg in May then it was a whirlwind! Every time we got news, we would always be hopeful but also conscious  of the worst outcome, and it was the worst outcome everytime. From being told she had lesions on her brain and thinking maybe she had had a mild stroke, then finding out that it was cancer, but its metastasis, then that it was lung cancer that was everywhere. Then being told out of the 3 lung cancers, she had small cell which is the worst, as it travels so quickly around your body and there is little treatment. It was just constant blows everytime. My mum was an absolute rock and so positive, she 100% thought she could fight it. It's just so sad. The best way to describe it, it was like watching someone get dimensia really quickly. Going from walking to being in a wheelchair in 3 weeks and struggling to find words to describe things. She still had so much life to live. I'm 33, not married or have children yet. It's so hard knowing she won't get to potentially see that and I won't have her there for those moments. My older sister has children and it's hard knowing that they don't have their nanny. I actually still have my Nan who is 86, so I can appreciate everything that they're going to miss out on. It's like everything we experienced as children, Christmas, birthdays etc etc with grandparents, will now need to be created somehow by us for mine and my sisters children. We sadly lost our dad in October too, and now life is throwing a Pandemic in the mix. Life really is so so crazy, you gotta roll with the punches I guess. 
I actually speak to mum all the time, and feel like she is still here. I think that's what gets me through things. It's just so crazy how cancer can take someone so quickly. I still feel like it isn't real, like why mum and it's almost a year since we lost her. 
She was such an amazing person. I know she would want me to continue on with life though and be as happy as possible. Sending love to you all, and as you all say, it's just taking one step at a time and doing what you feel is right.