Hello Matthew.c

I am so so sorry for all your wife and yourself are going through.  Its hard to find the words.  It breaks my heart.  Your love for your wife and each other shines through your pain.  You are with her being strong for her now, even though you feel your not.  I am thinking of you both.  

I lost my husband my soul mate, aged 60.  It will be 8 years on the 10th September.  Your words resonated and touched me so much.  My husband was my everthing, he was strong, much stronger than me.  We too had dreams, we wanted to spend a winter on the Canarian Island, Lanzarote where we holidayed so many times.  We wanted to move to the Island too.  Like you we had so many dreams, so much to do.  We had our first grandchild, he was 6 months old.  Its hard knowing how much he has missed and how much our now, grandsons have missed out on with their very special grandad.  it broke his heart knowing he would never see his grandson grow up.  I know we were lucky to have our grandson and for my husband to hold and love him, cherish him with the time he had.  

No one can take away what we had and I talk to my grandsons often about grandad and they blow kisses to the cloud and tell him they love him.

Cancer is so very cruel.  I had the support of our daughter, my sister in law and his aunts and uncles and friends.  Our local Hospice were amazing could not have got through without them.

I hope you have support to help you and your much loved wife through this very difficult and sad time.  Thinking of you xx

Hi Leigh it's 3,58 in the morning I have woken up thinking about my beautiful baby girl on her own, the house echos without her by my side laying in bed.

I have just read your reply and it touched me so much and knowing that I'm not on my own help the pain so thank you ️..

The love between you both is beautiful which makes it harder I know but God and heaven is beautiful and I know he will be watching and he's loving you all from the other side, I know he is also watching your beautiful grandchild grow he is always with you, I know my beautiful baby girl will always be by my side especially when i need her, i asked her to pop in to say hi from time to time, she smiled smiled through her tears and pain and  said always!

I keep asking myself why! And how did we get here, I keep reminiscing of happy times we had and I feel so happy knowing that we had such a beautiful life together and special one like you both had so we have to celebrate now evey memory we have because that is connection we have with our love ones on the other side, 

Thank you so much for sharing your story of how much love both had and still have 

Enjoy the rest of your life watching and loving your grandchild grow into a beautiful person likes yourselves and knowing one-day we both will join our love ones again ️ 

I’m so sorry to read this and the reply . It’s hard to find the words to say to you both . It’s 6 o’clock in the morning I’ve just woke up . I’m on end of life care. I’m 44 . I wanted so much more. Please know that you really do have lovely dreams I have been for a while now. It’s lovely that you describe your wife as your angel. I’m not sure how much you believe in the next life. I do believe. I  feel that I dream about it now , I’ve seen my mum and my baby girl who I lost I feel that I’m going home to them . Reading both of your posts you can hear the love . 

 Matthew.c I’ve just read your post again It takes me awhile to take things in now .so much of what you said I can relate to . Right down to where you wanted to move back to . Although not married I do have someone . We talk about how we will be together when it’s his time . He also said to try to visit him from time to time: and try to be the one who take him back home when it’s his time : he is not well also . Sending you and your wife love and your in my thoughts. You sound a strong person I know you will not feel you are . 

 Matthew.c  thank you so much for your kind words. I’m crying. Yes it would be a honour to say hi to your wife kelly from you . You know that she will know your talking to her x hope you saw my Second reply to you ??

Hi Clare yes I have just read your second post and thank you for taking the time saying those wonderful things about me, Clare you are so loved by your partner he sounds a strong person also and its comforting knowing the he is saying the same to you as I am to my wife, it's so beautiful he's there with you all of the way and knowing your be waiting for him like my Kelly will be for me, this isn't good bye Clare and thank you again from the bottom of my heart xxx

Your so welcome Matthew. My someone is unfortunately not with me in person as he also has cancer.  We talk everyday. Both too poorly to travel he lives on the island . Xx

Clare my heart breaks knowing your love one has cancer also and you can only talk together over the phone, blessyours and his heart, life is so cruel but you have each other and you both are an inspiration  i'm so proud to have spoken to you Clare, you keep dreaming of your beautiful baby girl and the love you have waiting and around right now God with waiting for you both and he will guide you xxxx

Thank you for your kind words xx