Cancer Chat online community
My husband was diagnosed with this last week and we are both in shock and at odds to know how to deal with it.
Both of us feel so alone - he because no-one can really understand unless they too have experienced this terible news, and me because
there is no-one to comfort me. He cannot. I am at a loss to know how to support him. Whatever I say is wrong - if I try to reassure, it's no good, if I try to
to encourage a sharing of feelings, that's no good. Sometimes he wants more information but when I find out things, then he says 'That's not helpful'.
Phheww! Anyway, I know it's early days, and step by step. I just feel so sad that our carefree days of just last week have gone forever and now we are in
this journey into the unknown, with deep sadness, anxiety and at this stage, helplessness. Thank you for reading this. Amelia
Welcome to this forum and let me thank you for telling us about your husbands leukaemia. It's small wonder you are both in shock and are finding it hard to deal with. A diagnosis of cancer turns our lives upside down and inside out. Having in the past been both a cancer patient and also having lost several family members to cancer, I know how it feels from both side believe me. Your husband is obviously finding to very hard to deal with this news but his attitude is not helping you at all. Some men seem to act this way and it make it much more difficult for their partners. However any time you want to talk Amelia, this is a good place to come for people on here know what you are having to try and deal with. At times, it seems like an impossible task. I hope that your husband, once the shock has worn off, will realize that he has hurt you by his attitude although I am sure he hasn't meant to do this. But in any case people on here including myself will do all we can to try and support you through this difficult time.
Please keep us posted Amelia, best wishes, Brian
I just wanted to welcome you to Cancer Chat and I am sure others will be along shortly to say hello. There is someone else here dad1929 with experience of chronic lymphocytic leukemia so I hope he sees your post and will respond to you. You could also reply to him in this thread for example.
It is normal for you both to be in shock at the moment. If you ever need to talk to our specialist nurses, you can ring them on 0808 800 40 40 Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm.
Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator
my name is jeff and i was diagnosed with cll/sll in july 2010 i was 53 then i`m now 55 and i know it turns your life upside down,but it does get easier,i myself had to have chemo after 4 months of being diagnosed but it worked well,although it did take time to recover enough to get back to my normal working life i have now managed to do a full year back at work and i`m doing ok and i have regular check ups,infact at the last one in september my oncologist described me in a letter from him as looking superb which made me laugh,as i`m getting a bit on the podgy side and my work pants are a bit hard to fasten,and i keep saying to myself that i will exercise but i think i will leave it till after xmas now,but to get back to things for you all,i found that keeping positive really helped although i know that is hard to do but keep coming on here and i`m sure that it will help,as i know it certainly helped me and i met an awful lot of nice people on this site,some of who have passed away but they were a really nice lot and i will never forget them and what they did for me,and how inspiring they were,so for now take care and i`m sending you cyber hugz to help you along the way,so don`t hesitate to get in touch.
jeff alias(dad1929) this is atribute to my late father who was born then x